


You say good morning when it's midnight

by Aceteroid



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Eventual Smut, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Slow Burn, Student Exchange
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-31
Updated: 2017-04-11
Packaged: 2018-09-21 04:36:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 28,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9531749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aceteroid/pseuds/Aceteroid
Summary: It sucks, when your best friend is on a student exchange at the other end of the world for three months.It sucks even more, when you fall in love with the step-brother of his exchange student.





	1. Chapter 1

To put it bluntly: Isak wasn’t a fan of skyping.  
  
He didn’t like the blurry images of the webcam, was annoyed by all the pixels and the seconds full of nothingness, when the connection froze and he hated, _hated_ , **_hated_** the bad audio quality, being barely able to understand anything.  
  
Especially when it was 7 o’clock in the freaking morning.  
  
However he still accepted the incoming call. Because after all, it was Jonas. And really, what wouldn’t he do for Jonas?  
“Isak!” Jonas smiled brightly and just then he realized how much he missed his best friend already.  
“Hey man, how’s it going?” Isak asked and he shifted slightly in front of the camera.  
“It’s awesome. Really, you should see it yourself!”  
  
Jonas left a day ago to participate in a student exchange in Seattle. Isak was happy for him, he really was. It was just… that he had to get through three months without his best friend. Without playing FIFA together on a lazy Sunday. Without complaining about their history homework and all the assignments they had to do. Without talking all day about absolutely everything and nothing at the same time, while eating kebab at their usual spot.  
And he despised that thought.  
Of course, Isak could talk to Mahdi and Magnus and the girls, but in the end? In the end it wasn’t Jonas. In the end he wasn’t able to hang out with them in the middle of the night, just because he felt like it, like he was able to with his best friend.  
  
“I mean, the flight was pretty terrible, actually”, Jonas explained, as he ran a hand through his dark curls.  
Isak just raised his brows in a silent question. _Tell me about it_.  
“It kinda was like in those bad sit-coms, where some annoying kid screams all day. _Did you know they really exist?_ I was shook.” He placed a hand on his chest, right above his heart and closed his eyes dramatically.  
Isak laughed. Because they just got each other. “What a terrible, terrible story. Poor you.”  
Jonas smiled even more. “However, as soon as I got off that plane… Damn, everything is fucking fine here. I love America!”  
“They still have violence. And racism. And _Trump_ , Jonas. **Trump**.”  
His best friend just sighed, but smirked nevertheless.  
“The family is really chill too”, he then added.  
“That’s cool, man. So that dude is nice then?”  
“He is, yeah. And the coolest thing is, that his step-mom and his step-brother are actually from Oslo, so if my English ever fails me, I can just ask them to translate that shit! Awesome, huh?”  
“Wait. What? _Oslo_?!”  
  
Isak still remembered that day the two of them had spent sitting on the floor in front of Isaks bed, checking every Social Media they could think of for the _oh so mysterious_ exchange student after Jonas had learned his name from their teacher. Alex Parks.  
They had found about hundred different guys called Alex on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, but eventually, they had just let it be.  
“It will be fine. I’ll just meet him and…”, Jonas had started and Isak had finished: “And hope not to be murdered by some psycho.”  
They had laughed.  
  
“Yup. I couldn’t quite believe it either. Alex’ father married his step-mom a few years ago and then they all moved together here in Seattle.”  
“You’re trying to tell me that you fly to the other end of the world… Just to meet more people from Norway?!” Isak grinned as Jonas shrugged.  
“I guess. Coincidence. Fate. Whatever.”  
“Damn, that’s something.”  
“Right? I… I just feel like those are going to be the best three months of my life. Today they showed me around the city as soon as we left the airport. We grabbed something to eat at some fancy restaurant and just..” Jonas started talking about his day, about all the things they did and even though Isak really tried to listen, he drifted off.  
  
Because right now, he couldn’t help but to feel a little disappointed. _I just feel like those are going to be the best three months of my life_. While Jonas was apparently having a good time, while he was exploring another city on another continent, thousands of kilometres away from home, he was sitting all by himself, not doing anything. Bonus: He felt quite miserable, since he missed his best friend so much. And of course, he wouldn’t tell Jonas, because it has only been _one. freaking. day._  
  
Instead he clapped his hands, his smile getting even larger, as Jonas finished talking.  
“I’m happy for you, man.”  
And he was. He really was.  
Despite being a little sad. He pushed that thought away and focused on his laptop instead. “Any plans for tomorrow?” he asked. Because in Seattle it was about 10pm. Different time zones were a pain in the ass.  
And Jonas told him.  
  
They talked for a while, his best friend enthusiastically sharing all of his impressions with him, not even bothering to check the time when someone called Jonas name in the background.  
“That was Alex. I’ll check what he wants and then I’ll be back”, he explained and Isak nodded.  
“Sure thing.”  
  
Isak watched as Jonas got up. And then he was by himself, staring at an empty kitchen table. There was a fruit bowl in the background. An actual fucking fruit bowl.  
Was Jonas exchange student a part of some kind of portrayal of a perfect family?  
  
Apparently yes. Because when a tall, lanky and remarkably handsome guy walked into the kitchen, Isak couldn’t tear his eyes away. Not even for a single second.  
  
He basically screamed perfection with his blond, styled hair and his high cheekbones. He watched as that guy crossed the kitchen, as he placed some dishes in the sink. And he stared at his back, at his shoulders, sneaking a glance at his…  
  
Then the guy turned around.  
  
And that’s the story of how Isak got caught while creepily checking out some dude through a webcam.  
  
The embodiment of attractiveness looked at him and raised his eyebrows, while a small smirk played on his lips. And god, his lips were full. And god, his eyes were blue. And god, and god, and god. There were so many things Isak wanted to look at.  
But he knew that he was blushing deeply and he blinked once, twice, to stop himself from staring.  
  
“Hi.”  
The only thing Isak could think about was how deep and warm and smooth that voice sounded and right then he asked himself how that boy could be even real. It was just too much.  
“Hi”, he echoed, hating how thin the word sounded. He desperately wanted to clear his throat.  
  
“Isak, right?”, the guy then asked and Isak just wanted to ask “How do you know my name?” but then he remembered that Jonas had probably talked about his plans to skype with him.  
He also was quite perplexed by how nice his name could sound. _“Isak, right?”,_ he repeated in his head.  
He nodded weakly as the boy smiled a slightly crooked smile, his eyebrows still raised.  
  
Then there were steps and just a second later Jonas appeared next to that guy and Isak was quite thankful, because it meant two things:  
1) He hadn’t made up that dude, if Jonas could see him too.  
2) Jonas stopped him from staring and making an even bigger fool out of himself.  
  
“Oh, so you’ve met Even”, Jonas said, as he looked at the gu.. at Even. 


	2. Chapter 2

He ended the call only a few minutes after Jonas’ return, because he wanted him to get enough sleep (and definitely not because he didn’t want to give excuses why he was blushing, why he was stuttering, why he was… generally a mess, after Even had left).  
  
_“Oh, so you’ve met Even.”_  
The words still echoed not just in his head, but in his entire body, as he closed his laptop with a small sigh.  
  
His hands found their way to his face and for a second he just stayed like this: Hiding from himself, with his eyes shut tight. His thoughts were too loud, a complete chaos. A groan escaped his lips.  
  
He was being ridiculous, he knew it. But Isak couldn’t help it.  
  
So the seconds flew by, formed into minutes and just a bit later, at around nine o’clock, he heard a knock on his door.   
“Wakey, wakey!” Eskild said in his half-singing-voice.  And awake he was.   
  


The next time Isak saw Even was on a Instagram picture Jonas had just uploaded.  
It showed his best friend, Even and another guy (which Isak assumed to be Alex, by the way Jonas had described the boy during their first skype session: short brown hair, a few freckles around his button nose). The three of them were leaning against a railing, the skyline of Seattle in the background with the sun hanging low.  
The words “ _y is there no space needle emoji_ ” as the caption. And the place was tagged too. Because apparently, that was a thing in the US. Tagging places. Isak didn’t remember Jonas doing this, ever. Until now. _Here: Space Needle, 400 Broad St, Seattle_.  
He looked at the smiling faces, first Jonas with that green Beanie on Isak gave him for Christmas, Jonas with the ruffled dark curls peeking out from under the hat. Next ( _probably_ ) Alex, with his head tilted back slightly like he was about to burst out into laughter. And then Even, with his small smirk, Even with the sunglasses hanging low from his shirt collar, exposing pale skin.  
Isak didn’t stare. He really didn’t. Not at all. Not even for a single second. Nope. Nu-huh.  
  
And he definitely didn’t scroll through every single like, just to see if he could find Evens account, since neither Alex nor him were tagged in the pic itself.  
Because who would do that? Not Isak. Obviously.  
  
Therefore he didn’t feel disappointed at all, when he didn’t find a profile that somehow fitted Even. Besides that he kind of did, just a teeny-tiny bit.  
  
Isak reminded himself, that this feeling was probably due to him missing Jonas. And really, he did miss him. Of course he did. Jonas had left three days ago. Three days, they would have normally spent together.  
The disappointment? It had nothing to do with the attraction he felt towards this random dude he’s seen twice, via crappy video quality or some small, vacuous picture.  
  
Because Isak wasn’t gay or anything.  
  
One could appreciate when a person was good looking, so him checking out Even didn’t mean anything. It didn’t make him _homosexual_.  
He remembered the times, Eskild had asked him for his opinion on some guy he had found on Grindr. “Saying that a man is handsome doesn’t mean you’re gay, Isak.” Both of them had sighed.  
  
And yeah, there had been a time when he has been… a little too fond of Jonas, but that was years ago.  
And totally normal! Isak had looked it up online.  
_Does crushing on your best friend make you gay?_ , he had googled back then.  
And there had been some blog, clearly telling him: _“The question as to whether or not having a friend crush makes you gay rises up once again. This is a very simple question to answer and put quite simply, no, having a friend crush in no way makes you gay.”*_  
He had stopped reading after that.  
Because he wasn’t gay. He had never been.  
  
So when a year ago Jonas used to hang out with Elias, the dude they had mostly gotten their weed from back then, the dude Isak had always disliked from the very beginning, since he was kind of a douche, there had been no actual reason why Elias had called him gay.  
Just… stupid jokes. Not funny, but jokes nevertheless.  
_“I’m not going to sleep in the same room as the gay guy.”_ Jonas had laughed and - in the very end – so had Isak. Laughing everything off.  
He never told anyone that it had kind of hurt. And if he had continued to listen to “gay songs”, as Jonas used to call it, when he was all by himself, no one had to know. Because “gay songs” didn’t make him gay.  
  
Actually, Isak had made out with plenty of girls. And gay guys didn’t do that, right?  
He had been together with Sara for a couple of weeks, had made out with Emma and with Maja and with Victoria and with… with other names he didn’t quite remember.  
So really, he wasn’t gay. Not a single bit. Of that, he was sure.  
  
Until he skyped with Jonas later that week.  
  
“So we went to this Chinese place and Alex and his Mom actually chose Teppanyaki? Totally had to think of you, man. You would have loved it. I even tried shrimps for the first time. Never again, though”, Jonas exclaimed. He always sounded so damn excited, smiling a huge smile, when he talked about those new experiences he made. And Isak couldn’t help but to smile as well.  
“Was it that bad?” he asked, grinning slightly.  
“You have no idea. It was disgusting.”  
“What was disgusting?” Even questioned, when he appeared in the doorframe, wearing washed out jeans and a grey shirt that showed off his collarbones. Isak didn’t stare. He never did. So he looked at his hands instead.  
“I was telling Isak about that Sushi place we went to”, Jonas explained.  
He heard Even make a small “Ah” sound, followed from a: “You mean Daimonji?”  
“Exactly. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to remember that name.”  
“It took me a while to get used to it too, no worries. Completely normal.” Isak could hear Evens smile in his voice.  
And he couldn’t help but to feel slightly out of place. Like he wasn’t supposed to listen to them talking. He couldn’t participate in that conversation. He hadn’t been to this The-Monkey sushi place anyway. He didn’t even like sushi. So… he shouldn’t feel left out.  
He only looked up, when Jonas addressed him again. “If you ever happen to come to Seattle, we have to go there”, he said. Isak nodded, a half-hearted smile on his lips.  
And when he shot a quick glance in Evens direction (definitely not to appreciate the way his shirt hung on his shoulders), he caught Even looking at him, all raised-eyebrows and smirks. So he quickly looked back to Jonas, with his cheeks just a little bit reddened.  
“I actually meant to tell you that Alex wanted to show you that video he was talking about earlier, Jonas”, Even then explained. As Isak returned to look at him, the blond fucking love child of Elvis, James Dean and Austin Butler (not that he would admit that he knew who Austin Butler was) shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans.  
“Oh?” Jonas asked and got up soon after that. “I’ll be back in a second, Isak.”  
  
And again: Isak was left alone with Even, but this time, Even actually knew he was there from the very beginning. So that was something new.   
  
“Is this how it always works with the two of you? Him leaving you during skype calls?” Even grinned as he took a few steps towards the laptop.  
“Always. I mean, that’s what friends are there for, right? Let them wait for you, when they get up an hour before school, just because they promised to skype-call-thing you.”  
“Skype-call-thing?” Even raised his eyebrows again, an amused smile tugging at his lips. Isak couldn’t help but to mimic it.  
He lowered his gaze and shrugged.  
“So you’re not a skype person, then?”  
“Nah, not really.” He shook his head. “I think it’s weird.”  
“Kinda, yeah. But it still gives you the possibility to talk to people that are way too far away. Or, you know, to look at guys, who’re putting away their dishes, not knowing that you’re there. **All the pros**.” Even smirked even more now.  
It was unfair. Because how could that guy look so good, while Isak was all blushy and insecure?  
“Uh…”, Isak started, not knowing what to say, since it must have seemed pretty creepy to Even. It would have seemed pretty creepy to _anyone_. Some boy silently looking at you without your knowledge.  
He blushed even harder. And when Even laughed at that, Isak felt like he was going to either turn into a tomato right away or explode. Or both. First turn into a tomato, then explode. Boom. Ketchup everywhere.  
“I’m just teasing, relax”, Even then said, as he fucking sat down in front of the laptop, how was Isak supposed to relax at that?  
“I’m chill. Totally chill”, he replied.  
“Totally”, Even echoed ad laughed again, this time a little less loud. Softer.  
And for some reason Isak didn’t quite understand he managed to relax at that.  
_Totally chill._  
  
When Jonas came back into the room, Even was leaning on the table, head rested on one of his palms. He looked at Isak and nodded here and there, while Isak talked about a party he went to last month.  
Because apparently the dude who threw up into the bushes at half past eleven was an old buddy of Even.  
It was strange to realize, that the old saying really was true. The world indeed was one very small place. At least Isak couldn’t quite believe it, so he told Even everything he could remember about said dude.  
Jonas stood in the doorframe – just as Even did about ten minutes ago – and this time, his eyebrows were raised, as he looked at the two of them.  
  
Isak only noticed his best friends about half a minute after his arrival.  
“Uh.. hi”, he greeted and Jonas grinned a bit: “Sorry, didn’t want to interrupt you. Because apparently you have a new best friend you want to talk to now?”  
  
Isak blushed at that.  
And then even more, when he saw how Evens smirk grew bigger at Jonas words. “We were just having a chat, man. Don’t worry, I’m not going to steal Isak away from you”, Even then said.  
  
And again, Isaks entire attention held onto the way his own name sounded, when Even pronounced it.  
He felt like he would close his eyes at the constellation of letters, if Even would just say it one more time. Luckily, he didn’t.  
So, for a quick second, he just let his tongue dart out between his lips instead. A habit he would never be able to let go of.  
When he felt Evens eyes on him, he looked down at his hands.  
  
He heard how he got up from his chair, followed by the steps crossing the room.  
When his gaze darted upwards, he saw Even petting Jonas shoulder with that absurdly attractive smirk on his lips, the amusement clear on his face.  
  
 “At least not yet”, Even added.  
  
And then the taller guy walked out of the room, like it was nothing. Like he didn’t just set fire to Isaks thoughts.  
  
A moment later Jonas sat back in front of the laptop and met his eyes with a questioning look. And of course: He was grinning. “Sooo…?” Jonas asked, the words drawn out deliberately.  
  
Isak felt like he had just set a record.  
_The boy who blushed the most in one single day, even before 9 o'clock._  What a way to go down in history. He could already see the article in the Guinness Book of World Records.  
  
Okay, so maybe he had some tiny doubts about the whole gay thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *https://lgbtnation.wordpress.com/2012/01/18/do-friend-crushes-mean-youre-gay/  
> (If you wonder which blog assured Isak, that he's not gay for Jonas. He really should have read the entire article...) 
> 
> Pretty please tell me your opinion on this!  
> It keeps me motivated <3


	3. Chapter 3

Walking to school felt off without Jonas by his side, because normally, they walked together and were joined by Magnus and Mahdi at some point.  
Today though, Isak was with only the two of them, who were talking about the last party they’ve been to on Saturday, while strolling next to him.  
  
“You should come next time. Emma asked about you”, Mahdi explained and Isak sighed for a moment, tilting his head back.  
“I’m not interested in her, I already told you guys.”  
“But… uh, please explain again. Why exactly do you keep saying that? She’s hot. Like, _at least_ a 9. You don’t find someone like her any day.” Magnus said immediately.  
“It was more.. you know, like a thing for one evening. That’s it.”  
“A one night stand, then?” Magnus wiggled his eyebrows and Mahdi shook his head, with a small grin on his lips.  
“More than you will ever get.” Isak shrugged and Mahdi cheered.  
“Wait, does that mean she was good, or…?”  
  
He survived without Jonas, because sure, there had always been a few classes where they were separated, biology for example, or physics, or gym class, but knowing Isak had to spend another two months and twenty-two days (not that he was counting) without his best friend at all?  
  
It sucked. A lot.  
  
It was weird to stand in front of his locker, trying to get the door open, as almost every single day, just to end up looking to his right without spotting the familiar dark curls and the black _fjallraven kanken_ backpack.  
And every time he took a quick glance in the direction, he couldn’t help but feel a little sting in his chest.  
  
Mahdi appeared next to him, as he finally managed closing his locker (because his locker hated him – and closing it was about as hard as getting it open).  
“Yo, man, I totally forgot to mention it earlier”, he said, as soon as Isak had turned to look at him.  
He raised his eyebrows in question. “Hm?”  
“Magnus and I have been thinking about skyping with Jonas. You know, to hang out together as a group and stuff. So, how about we’ll meet up next weekend and just surprise him? Like, you call him but when he accepts the call, boom, we’re all there!”  
“Sounds cool, yeah. We can do that.”  
  
Even after that Isak couldn’t deny the slight discomfort in his stomach, when thinking about Jonas.  
Because for some reason, he felt like Jonas didn’t quite miss them.    
At least not as much as Isak, Magnus and Mahdi missed him. He knew that the thought was probably just him being silly, but still, he couldn’t shake the feeling off entirely.  
  
Maybe it was due to all the things Jonas talked about, when they skyped.  
About the “best fucking pizza” they had a few days ago while watching the super bowl on TV (“Really, it was amazing. Not even _Oliveros_ can compare to that dream of food coming true”).  
About his first day at an American school (“I even had to wear a uniform! Can you believe it?! With the school badge on and everything!”).  
About all the girls he had been talking to (“Apparently they have a thing for foreign boys, man. I got like seven numbers in a single day. Don’t tell Mags, though. He would probably want me to introduce him to some – who am I kidding – to all of them.”)  
About so many things.  
But not about how he missed home.  
  
And maybe he just didn’t, because he was busy. That had to be it.  
  
Because skyping every other day? It simply had to mean that Jonas missed the boys and him.    
He didn’t only do it because Isak asked him to, every time they were about to end a call. They skyped because they _both_ wanted to keep updated on each other’s lives. Of that he was sure.  
And when they would hang out together via skype next weekend it would be cool, totally chill, like Jonas was here with them. He was positive about it.  
Or at least he wanted to be.  
  
He pushed away all those doubts as Jonas name, together with a picture of him standing in front of a blue wall, arms crossed in front of his chest, popped up on his laptop screen.  
  
_Incoming call from Jonas Noah Vasquez._  
  
He accepted it only after letting a few seconds pass – one, two, three, four, five, six, he counted silently – since he didn’t want to seem like he had spent the last few minutes waiting for this moment. Even though that was exactly what he had done.  
He knew it was stupid.  
  
When he ended up looking at his best friends smiling face, he mirrored it.  
And he discarded his thoughts without hesitation.  
  
“Hey, man”, Jonas greeted, as he was leaning back in his chair.  
  
Isak could make out the kitchen furnishings in the background. However this time the countertops seemed more… settled in:  
There was some bread, next to a glass of Nutella, a knife placed on top of the lid. A half-sliced apple. Maybe that meant that the fruit-bowl wasn’t that perfect anymore either.  
For whatever reason, it made Isak feel strangely calm. Like the people living in that house were actual human beings, not just actors in some sort of Ikea-kitchen-commercial.  
  
“Halla”, he then said.  
  
They talked for a while, about everything and nothing: Isak complaining about his history assignment (“I don’t give a shit about world war one. **This. Is. Torture.** I feel like the only solution is to bang my head against my desk. Two, or three times, maybe. Do you think knocking myself out counts as an excuse for me not to write that shit?”) and Jonas swooning over the skate park Alex and him went to last evening (“We met some guys there, Arlen and Travis, and we taught each other some tricks. It was chill. You should see my improved kick flip.”)  
  
When Even walked into the kitchen, Jonas first didn’t notice. Isak, however? He did. Of course he did.  
How could one not notice that boy, who was completely drenched, from head to toe and still looked unfairly good?  
He had pushed his wet hair back, but a few strands were falling into his face nevertheless (a part of Isak – that he didn’t want to think about – ached to push it off his forehead).  
He also was holding onto some dripping red fabric – and thanks to Isaks _outstanding_ observations skills and his _excellent_ abilities when it came to putting one and one together - that fabric happened to be his shirt.  
Because Even? He was standing in the middle of the kitchen. Topless.  
  
And Isak couldn’t tear his eyes away, even if he had wanted to.  
  
He soaked it all in, the entire picture that was presented in front of him.  
The jeans hanging low on his skinny hips. The waistband of his boxers showing, the dark material in a sharp contrast to his pale skin. The fucking blue socks with a bright yellow rubber duck print.  
Again Isak asked himself: How was that guy even real? How, _how_ , **_how_**?  
  
He knew that he was staring.  
But when that freaking portrayal of a Greek god walked into the kitchen like this, he just couldn’t change it. There was no use in trying.  So he didn’t. He just looked.  
  
He watched as Even fiddled with the water kettle, as he rummaged through the cabinets, as he took out a cup and put a tea bag into it.  
For a second he even wondered what kind of tea Even liked. _Camomile? Peppermint? Black tea? Or maybe something sweeter?_  
  
It shouldn’t be so fascinating, Isak was aware of that. But there was just… something he couldn’t quite name, that drew all of his attention towards the other boy. He held onto every single detail. _And it wasn’t all about him being shirtless. Really, it had nothing to do with that. That was more like a side information._  
  
And at some point Jonas must have noticed, that  
a) Isak didn’t listen anymore, because he stopped talking about their trip to the mall and instead raised his eyebrows slightly at him.  
and  
b) that Even had arrived, because Jonas turned around shortly after.  
Isak was happy that he couldn’t see his best friends face in that exact moment. So he just licked his lips, while Even was still busy with making tea. While he was still not wearing a shirt.  
  
“Oh, hi, Even”, said Jonas.  
  
Every single thought in Isaks mind stopped at the words. He blinked once, twice, hoping to catch himself, to get a grip. No more daydreams about the way Evens back looked, when he was slightly bending over the water kettle.  
  
Then, the blond looked over his shoulder, smiling at Jonas. “Hey”, he answered and did a little wave into Isaks direction afterwards.  
  
He couldn’t help but blush.  
And Isak knew that he had to work on this. Not turning into a reddened chaos every time Even just looked at him.  
Because if he didn’t, what exactly was he supposed to do, if Even smiled at him or laughed again?  
Dying right in front of the webcam didn’t seem like an option.  
  
So he just lowered his gaze for now.  
  
Also because he didn’t want to continue gaping.  
  
“Dude, what happened?” he heard Jonas ask and he dared to look up for a moment, just to see Even drop his shirt into the sink with a wet _swash_.  
“I missed my tram after work, so I had to wait in the pouring rain for the next one. When it finally arrived there were some technical problems like five tram-stops later, so the passengers were asked to wait for a bus that would replace the tram.”  
He shrugged. Then continued:  
“I didn’t want to wait any longer, so I walked. End of the story.”  
  
He wore a small smirk on his lips as Jonas nodded.  
  
“So you have been walking for how long?” Isak asked and he felt surprised by hearing his own voice. When exactly did he decide to say something? He didn’t know.  
“About twenty minutes, I think.”  
“Damn”, he just said and grinned a bit. And Even grinned too.  
“I think I can take a little rain.”  
“Are you sure about that? Your hair looks pretty wrecked to me.”  
“I’m Fortune’s fool!” Even exclaimed, placing a hand on his chest dramatically, looking into the distance for a moment.  
Isak saw how Jonas started smirking. His cheeks felt a little hot, but he still decided to try and act cool.    
So he just raised his eyebrows at Even. “Fortune’s Fool?” he asked.  
“No?” A pause, in which Even turned to look at Isak.  
“What?”  
“Romeo and Juliet?”  
Isak shook his head and this time it was Evens who raised his eyebrows.  
“Next time, I will try harder and fix mine hair ere I show up.”  
Jonas laughed at that and eventually Even and Isak joined in as well.  
  
They talked and talked and talked, cracked jokes, all three of them, until the water for Evens tea was ready. And it felt good and natural and just like they were meant to be spending their time like this.  
Maybe they were.  
  
“It was good to see you, Isak”, he said and fucking winked at him.  
“On your way to steal him away from me?”, Jonas asked, looking at Even and Even had that ridiculously attractive crooked smile on his lips before he shrugged again and exited the kitchen short after with the steaming cup in his hands and the wet fabric of his shirt thrown over his shoulder.  
  
As soon as he was gone Jonas tilted his head to the side, looking at Isak with a grin. “Sooooo?”, he asked, obviously amused by the whole situation and Isak froze a bit.  
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, man. He’s not being serious, you know that.”  
  
And with those words he changed the topic. And Jonas let him.  
  
“So, that skate park. Is it bigger than the one here?”  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys make me so very happy with your comments and kudos!  
> Please, please, please, do share your opinion on this with me, since it's my driving force!
> 
> also: I will try to upload asap, of course! however school keeps me busy nowadays, so I'll try my best!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: this chapter contains mild smut.

For Isak, there were only two ways to shower.  
  
The first way was hectic, almost a little chaotic.  
It was stepping under the running water, which was either too hot or too cold.  
It was grabbing the bottles randomly and hoping not to smell like a garden full of roses afterwards (because _no_ , he wasn’t Eskild, he didn’t like to smell like a random arrangement of flowers).  
It was almost slipping when stepping out of the shower into the cold air of the bathroom.  
It was so many things, but none of them had something to do with time for himself and calmness and just letting go.  
The first way took him about two minutes, before he shut the front door behind him, hurrying off to school.   
  
The second way took him hours.  
It was him leaning onto the cool tiled walls, eyes closed, as his mind relaxed and things slowed down a bit.  
It was thoughts, so many thoughts, about anything and everything and nothing at the same time.  
It was humming low melodies under his breath, tunes of whatever song was stuck in his head.  
It was carefully choosing one of the bottles (and considering _“maybe I want to smell like a random arrangement of flowers for once, flowers are nice”_ ).  
  
Today was one of those days.  
With Eskild already at work, Noora having a sleepover with the girls at Evas place and Linn staying in her room almost all day nobody could tell him to finally shut the water off.  
Not that he didn’t care about the environment or anything, but sometimes he just needed it.  
  
Sometimes he needed the steam to surround him.  
  
Especially after the late night skype session yesterday, after seeing Even like that and not being able to get the picture out of his head.  
  
Because sometimes? Sometimes the second way meant his hands wandering until he tilted his head and parted his lips.  
  
Isak didn’t mean to think about him in the first place.  
  
But when he woke up in the middle of the night with a tingling feeling in his gut it was hard to actually get back to sleep.  
  
He had to concentrate _not to concentrate_ on Even, with the image of his slightly toned chest and the way the jeans had clung to his hips in his head.  
Eventually he had managed.  
  
Right now, though?  
Right now, he didn’t.  
  
He stood there, under the pleasantly warm water, leaned against the wall and he couldn’t help but let his fingertips ghost over his own skin.  
  
And Isak knew, he probably shouldn’t do this, he should feel bad about it since he **knew** Even, it wasn’t just some fantasy of an anonymous face that he would never see again.  
But with the picture of full lips wearing a small smirk and suggestively raised eyebrows in front of him when he closed his eyes, he couldn’t _not_ do it. His body ached for the touch.  
  
When the first sigh escaped he gave in. He continued.  
Because it was already too late.  
  
He thought about the muscles of the boy’s back, the way they had moved when he had stretched to get a cup from the far back of the cabinet.  
He thought about his hands holding onto the wet fabric of his shirt.    
He thought about the sound of his voice, the sound of his own name.  
_Isak._  
Like it was not just a melody, but a symphony. So much more than a random combination of letters.  
  
He wondered how those muscles would move above him.  
Wondered how those hands would feel like on his skin, wrapped around him (were they as strong as they looked like or would they be softer, more gentle?).  
Wondered how breathy whispers or low moans or gasps of that voice would sound like.  
  
So he let himself explore. He let his mind wander from one idea to the next, moving from fantasy to fantasy.  
  
He picked up the pace, when he felt his body tense up by the sensation and the thoughts.  
  
The strokes became more determined as he tipped his head back.  
  
And when he fell the name slipped from his lips.  
_Even, Even, Even._  
He tasted the word and felt at peace.  
  
Until Isak opened his eyes again, looked down and saw the leftover of the mess he had made.  
It was almost washed away by the water (how long had he stayed still, with his mouth slightly agape?), but it still felt like some sort of proof, like an evidence that he really went that far, that he overstepped a silent, non-spoken boundary.  
  
He had gotten himself off to the thought of a guy that was over a thousand miles way. A guy he barely knew.  
He felt like he would never be quite able to meet his eyes again – not that he had been particularly good when it came to eye contact in the first place, but now? It almost felt impossible.  
  
He blinked.  
  
And as he cleaned himself up and stepped out of the shower soon after that, wrapping himself in a towel, he tried to push the realisation away.  
  
Into the far back of his head.  
  
Where the thoughts had started and where they should stay.  
  
Because he didn’t want the _little gay_ turn into _kind of gay_.   
He knew that he probably didn’t make much sense.  
  
But for now, he blamed it on him being a teenager.  And being a teenager could be confusing at times.  
  
  
  
In some way Isak was nervous, tense, almost a little bit anxious, when it came to skyping with Jonas again.  
Because a part of him was scared shitless that Jonas would able to read him the way he always did. What if he _knew_ the second Isak greeted him?  
He had already asked about Even the last time they talked.  
And if he did it again, if he tried to dig deeper, Isak was bound to die because of the embarrassment.  
  
So when he sat in front of his laptop on wednesday evening, a part of him was relieved, when Jonas texted him that he couldn’t make it.  
Because that way he didn’t have to face things just now.   
  
He knew he couldn’t run forever, but at the present time Isak was fine with it.  
And if that meant he had to parkour through his mind, jumping and ducking and running, running, running to get away from his head that was okay.  
He left his thoughts behind, shoving everything away as far as possible.  
  
However, when the weekend came he knew that the warm-up phase was over.  
  
Time for the final marathon.  
  
If he managed to convince Jonas that nothing was up, he would be fine. And he knew it was possible.  
He had managed to act completely normal around Magnus and Mahdi, too, so how difficult could it be?  
He just had to try.  
  
Isak was listening to N.W.A, the music blasting through his headphones, when there was a knock on his door.  
He didn’t hear it. Not the first time and not the second time.  
He didn’t hear the “You better not be naked, we’re coming in, dude!”  
  
When the boys walked into his room, though, he noticed. With raised eyebrows he pulled out the ear buds.  
“Who let you in?”  
“Linn did. After we rang the doorbell for years, man. I almost froze my ass off!” Magnus complained, flopping down onto his bed.  
“Oh”, Isak said, followed by short shrug. “Sorry.”  
“He’s being extra dramatic because some girl on the bus apparently flirted with him first and then walked away, when he tried talking to her.” Mahdi grinned, as he sat down on the floor next to the bed.  
Isak laughed. “Again?”  
“Again”, Mahdi agreed and in the back, Magnus let out a small huff.  
“You guys want some beer?”  
He didn’t even have to wait for an answer.  
  
They called Jonas about twenty minutes later – almost 9 o’clock in Oslo and 11:48am in Seattle, all of them sitting in front of the laptop with their beer cans already half empty.  
  
When the window popped up and Isak saw Jonas sitting in the kitchen (again: he tried not to overthink, because he was _chill_ , really, _totally calm_ ) they all smiled brightly.  
  
“Fuck, are you guys for real?” Jonas laughed.  
And for once it felt like home again.  
  
Magnus threw his hands up in the air, almost hitting Isak in the process. “Man, I need my squad around me!”  
“Naw, you miss me?”  
“Actually that’s his way of telling you, that you should come back so you can get us weed again”, Mahdi joked and Jonas laughed.  
“Don’t laugh, he’s being serious. You’re the only one that Elias actually talks to.” Isak deadpanned, breaking into a slight grin shortly after.  
“You only love me for the dope? I’m hurt.”  
  
Isak couldn’t help but notice that Evens humour seemed to rub off on Jonas. The dramatic gestures. The “staring-into-the-distance”-thing.  
He didn’t want to think about Even. So he took a sip from his beer instead.  
  
“The bitter truth, dude”, Mahdi said and Isak agreed: “You had to find out sooner or later.”  
“Wait, what? I thought you get weed from Jakob?”, Magnus asked Mahdi with a slight frown on his face.  
And Mahdi turned to look at him for a moment. “Jakob moved to Bergen to go to university there, remember?”  
“Shit, right.”  
“You totally ruined the moment, man.”  
Jonas grin became even bigger. “ _The moment?_ You mean in which you guys called me to talk about the guy Mahdi gets his grass from?”  
The three boys all shrugged in union, smirking.  
  
They continued the conversation effortlessly, jumping from one subject to another, talking about everything that they could think of, almost as Jonas wasn’t sitting in some kitchen at the other end of the world.  
  
“…Like we walked into the record shop and you know, just rummaged through all those albums, when Even walked up to us, showing us that Gabrielle-Single. I mean… just imagine: Two guys in the rap section, all professional and shit, discussing the best songs of the 90s and then he comes up with fucking _Gabrielle_! He even asked the owner to put the song on.”  
  
“Wait, who exactly was Even?”, Magnus then asked – even though Jonas had mentioned him earlier already.  
  
However he had used many names in the last few minutes (and Isak, too, couldn’t remember most of them, even though he was pretty sure he had heard them all before at some point).  
  
“Alex' brother. The guy from Norway.”  
  
For a second Isak felt Jonas eyes on him and he looked at his hands automatically.  
  
And then Jonas added: “Hasn’t Isak told you about him? They’re getting along quite well.”  
  
“Yeah, we… uh… we barely talked”, he tried to explain himself and when he looked up again, he spotted Jonas’ smirk.  
“Sure.”  
  
He was painfully aware of his cheeks heating up at his best friend’s tone of voice.  
  
“Isak, are you sure your laptop is alright? I mean, you mentioned that the webcam quality sucks ass, but you look pretty red here and...” Magnus then said, as he eyed the screen precisely.  
  
“Uhm.”  
  
He then turned to look at Isak. “Okay, why are you blushing?”  
  
Jonas smiled even more and Mahdi just raised one eyebrow in question.  
  
Luckily, no one demanded an answer, when Jonas continued talking about the city.  
  
The hours passed and somewhere along the line Mahdi and Magnus left after they had finished their third beer.  
  
Isak and Jonas however? They still chatted some more because that’s what they always did.  
  
He wished he had ended the call with the goodbyes of his two friends, though, when Jonas brought up a certain topic once again.  
  
“So what’s going on with you and Even?”, he asked and he didn’t sound amused anymore, but instead just… genuinely interested.  
  
“Nothing is going on. What should be going on? I have no idea what you’re talking about”, Isak responded, maybe a little bit too fast, a little bit too hurried (and also a little bit too nervous, but he didn’t admit that to himself).  
Jonas raised his eyebrows.  
“Isak, are you sure?”  
“What?”, he just asked instead of properly answering the question.  
“It’s just… I’m not blind, man. And I know you. When you act so strange I figured there has to be something up.”  
“But there really isn’t anything going on!”  
  
He almost sounded pleading. _Please believe me. Please make me believe it myself._  
Jonas didn’t reply, so Isak licked his lips before he spoke a second time:  
  
“I mean, I’m not… I’m not gay or anything!”  
“No need for labels, dude.”  
  
Isak just stared at him for a second or two. Because how could he be so relaxed when it came to all of this?  
  
It almost seemed, like it wasn’t important to Jonas, like it didn’t matter, like it was all just fucking irrelevant if he liked Even or not.  
  
It seemed like Jonas only wanted to understand.  
And maybe that was it.  
  
So he stared at his keyboard for a moment, before he glanced at his best friend again.  
“Even is pretty.. pretty handsome”, he eventually got out.  
  
And in that exact moment the tall boy walked into the kitchen.  
  
Isak felt like his only option was to knock himself out with the biology book next to him. No other possibility. One well-aimed hit.  
  
In the end, though? He just looked at Even.  
He looked at him as he crossed the room, as he opened the fridge, as he took a bottle of juice and then… just walked away.  
  
Neither a hello nor a single glance.  
  
As soon as he was gone Isak buried his face in his hands.  
“Kill me”, he groaned and placed his head on the table top.  
  
Jonas made a small sympathetic sound and Isak was sure, his best friend would have probably patted his back right then and there, if it wasn’t for him to be in freaking _Seattle_.  
  
But he was.  
  
And as a matter of fact: If it wasn’t for him to be in Seattle, Isak wouldn’t have to get through all of this in the first place.  
  
Instead of saying something he just continued to hide his bright red face (and maybe he pitied himself _a little bit_ for the worst luck and/or the worst timing to have ever happened in human history).  
  
“So… Handsome, huh?”, he heard Jonas ask.  
  
“Jonas. **NOT. THE. TIME.** ”  
  
  
  
When Even didn’t greet Isak the next time he walked in on Jonas and him skyping, he started thinking.  
Because yes, he knew that he had embarrassed himself. Quite much, to be exact. He was aware of that.  
   
But when Even kept on ignoring him, when he continued to do things in the background without talking to him once, without looking at him for a second, he couldn’t stop the slight anxiety in the pits of his stomach.    
  
Even must have heard what Isak had said about him.  
_“Even is pretty… pretty handsome.”_  
  
He must have seemed like the biggest creep in this entire universe.  
Because no one says stuff like that, it was weird and inappropriate and just strange.  
  
So Even backing away? It was totally his fault. If he had managed to get a grip everything would have been fine.  
  
However, he had messed it up. Of course he had. If he was good at one thing, it was ruining stuff.  
  
He continued holding onto the idea for the next few days.  
  
When Jonas asked him about it, he didn’t reply. Instead, he changed the topic.  
Because he knew that he had himself to blame.  
  
Creep. Weirdo.  
Isak remembered Elias calling him the gay guy.  
  
He didn’t cry. Not even once.  
Because he kept reminding himself, that there was no reason to.  
He didn’t know Even. So if the guy treated him like he wasn’t even there, he shouldn’t care.  
  
However, he still felt dull.   
  
  
  
As the days passed, so did the feeling of numbness.  
  
Even didn’t even bother to show up during the skype sessions anymore.  
And the longer Isak didn’t see him, the easier it got.  
  
_He is just some boy._ He repeated those words over and over in his head.  
  
At one point he started to believe it.  
  
So when he skyped with Jonas, he didn’t think about Even anymore.  
He didn’t spend thoughts on the tall boy.  
Instead he focused on the here and now. He focused on the important things. He focused on anything but Even.  
  
He even managed to finish his history assignment.  
  
So after eight entire Even-free days he almost didn’t feel like an emotional wreck anymore.  
  
He felt like a functional member of society.  
He managed to go to the store to buy toilet paper and coffee when Eskild asked him to, even though that meant he had to pass the DVD and blue ray section near the checkout counter where Romeo + Juliet stared at him accusingly. He didn’t think about Even, when he looked at the faces of young DiCaprio and Claire Danes.  
  
He was alright.  
  
Until Even showed up again on a saturday morning when Jonas had left for the bathroom.  
He walked into the kitchen just to pause in front of the laptop, his hands in the pockets of his hoodie.  
  
He looked tired, more pale than usual.  
There were hints of shadows under his eyes and where they usually looked bright, they now just seemed tired. However, even like this, he was beautiful. And really, it was unfair.  
  
All he needed to say was a simple “halla”.  
His voice sounded distant, even a bit scratchy (almost as he hadn’t used it in a while), but it still managed to make Isak feel warmer in his chest.  
  
So there he was: back to being a mess in a matter of seconds. Even though he had been so sure he had gotten over the whole thing.  
He wasn’t over it. And he knew that he never was.  
Not a single bit, not for one moment, no matter how hard he had tried to convince himself.  
  
“Halla”, he echoed. They looked at each other.  
And when Even didn’t say anything, he asked: “Where have you been?”  
“I haven’t been feeling too well.” Even looked at the floor for one moment, before he met Isak’s eyes again.  
“Oh.” Another pause. “And you’re… you’re feeling better now?”  
“A little, I guess. Not completely good yet, but I think I’ll manage.”  
They both nodded.  
“I’ll better go”, Even then said. And he did without another word.  
  
He never got something from the kitchen.  
Isak wondered why he showed up in the first place.  
  
  
  
Even disappeared again for another week and it did weird things to Isak.  
He was sad. He was angry. He was hurt. Even a little bit lost. But mostly, he was worried.  
  
Because he wanted to know if Even was fine, wanted to know if he was getting better, even though he still was a bit pissed at the boy for just ignoring him for days. _Again_.  
  
“Is Even alright?” he asked one evening, as he skyped with Jonas.  
They were both doing homework in silence mostly, so his question made his best friend look up from the essay he had to write. He furrowed his brow.  
“…Uh, yeah. I mean, he’s been sick for a while now. Hasn’t left his room, because he doesn’t want me to get ill, too. But I guess he’s alright.”  
“Okay.” He nodded, even though it didn’t feel okay. What else was he supposed to do?  
  
So when Even showed up in the kitchen a few days later, his hair damp and only wearing red boxers and a huge white t-shirt, ignoring him again, he couldn’t help it.  
“Listen, if you want to get better you have to dry your hair. Or at least wear shoes. Or clothes in general. Jonas mentioned that the floor in the kitchen is cold.” Even turned to look at him. So he continued.  
“And I don’t care if you’re mad at me or… or if you think I’m weird because I said that you’re hot. You can get back to ignoring me, afterwards. But, really, if you want to get better, you should put on something or stay in bed. Or else that cold will stick with you.”  
He stared at Isak, not answering.  
  
After that things slowly got back to normal.  
  
Even showed up during skype sessions again, first rarely and then more often.  
He said hello, even waving sometimes when he entered or left the room.  
  
And even if Isak didn’t understand shit, he couldn’t help to feel relieved (but also still a tiny bit frustrated by the past few weeks since Even had neither apologized, nor explained things).  
  
  
  
In the last five minutes Isak had called Jonas two times without him answering.  
He checked the time, then called again.  
Because they had agreed to talk at 11 o’clock.  
  
Isak stared at the screen of his laptop, tapping his fingers impatiently and, when Jonas accepted the call, rolled his eyes.  
“About fucking time, man.”  
  
Even looked back at him and he raised his eyebrows at his words.  
“Halla.”  
The sound of his deep voice filled his head and he couldn’t help to shiver a little. Their first actual talk in weeks.  
  
“Hi”, he answered eventually, blinking not just once but twice.  
  
He hadn’t expected to face him like this.  
And as if Even had guessed his thoughts, he explained:  
  
“Jonas is still in the shower. I saw that you were calling when I passed his room and asked him about it. He wanted me to tell you that he’ll be done in a second.”  
  
“Oh. Okay.” Isak felt stupid for the brief answer. So he added: “I guess, I’ll call again later, then.”  
  
“No, no. You don’t have to. I mean, he’ll be here soon, so…”  
  
The quiet spread between them and only the music that Isak had put on a few minutes earlier kept them from complete silence.  
  
“I love that song”, Even said out of nowhere (and it almost seemed as he **wanted** them to have a conversation which made Isak stare - _again_ ).  
“Yeah, me too.”  
“It kinda reminds me of _New York State of Mind_.”  
“New York State of Mind?” Isak asked. And Even raised his eyebrows one more time.  
“By NAS. You don’t know NAS?”  
  
He stumbled over his own words. “Uh, sure? I totally know him.”  
“Really? Doesn’t sound too much like it.”  
  
Even grinned a little. It has been ages since he saw him doing that.  
The warm feeling in his chest was back and just then he realised how relieved he was.  
So he mirrored the grin.   
  
“Pff, I love NAS. I have been a fan of his music for years!”  
“You should listen to him sometimes.”  
  
They both smiled a little.  
And even though a part of him still wanted to be angry at Even, he couldn’t. It just wasn’t possible.  
  
Then, Jonas came back and Even left the two of them alone shortly after.  
  
For some reason it didn’t feel as final as the last few times.  
  
Isak liked the idea.  
  
  
  
The next time the boy saw Even, he was in a Snapchat Jonas had sent him. A ten-second-video.   
  
It showed Alex, Even and Jonas himself playing some kind of board game that looked surprisingly similar to the version of _Ludo_ that had always used to sit in his parents living room shelf.  
Jonas had zoomed in on his exchange student that Even was sitting next to.  
  
Alex looked straight at the camera before glancing at Even, whispering: “Get **_rekt_**.”  
  
Then, just a second later, he kicked a token (that was apparently Evens) from the board.  
  
A sudden outburst of a loud “ _NOOOO!_ ”, followed by Evens laughter filling up the room.    
  
And a part of Isak melted at the sound – because it was nice to hear him laugh again. It had been quite a while.  
  
The video was over way too soon and for a second Isak was tempted to repeat it. But he didn’t want Jonas to know.  
  
So he put his phone away instead and let himself fall back onto the mattress with a small sigh.  
  
If he smiled no one had to know. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, that was something...?  
> If you want to, come and say hi on my tumblr: @aceteroid
> 
> As always: please, do share your thoughts and feelings with me! <3


	5. Chapter 5

When his phone buzzed during his last lesson of the day Isak ignored it. Because it was biology class and biology class meant two exact things:  
1\. The teacher was strict.  
In fact, she was so strict that she kept phones she spotted in school not just for the rest of the day, but for the entire week.  
And if it happened on a Friday – such as today - it meant Isak would be basically fucked, because he’d not get his phone back until monday.  
He didn’t want that to happen.  
2\. Sana was sitting next to him.  
And if she caught just a tiny glimpse of Isak checking his messages she would shoot him a judging look and eventually she’d give him shit for it, when they had to answer questions together again.  
(“If you're only on your phone, how are you supposed to know what you're talking about? You’re not even listening to what the teacher says. It’s definitely answer A, you’d know _that_ if you had paid attention”).  
  
So Isak just continued to copy the notes about metabolism from the board, trying to focus on the words (and trying to decipher the teachers barely readable handwriting), as his phone buzzed a second and finally a third time.  
  
Only when they had to read a text on the topic a few minutes later and the teacher left the classroom to get a model of a mitochondrion in order to clarify the process of the respiratory chain, he pulled out his phone, since he had already read the passages before the lesson had started (because Isak hated not understanding things completely when it came to biology, so he had tried to figure things out a little bit).  
  
Notifications of messages from an unknown number filled his lock screen. And for a second, he furrowed his brows slightly.  
  
Because the last time an unknown number had texted him was when Mahdi had lost his phone and got a new one about a week later, letting the guys know that they should add him to the group chat again.  
  
He didn’t just give his number to random people, so he wondered who the hell would send him a bunch of messages out of nowhere.  
  
Isak took a quick glance to his left, where Sana was still busy reading and taking notes here and there.  
He saw how she placed a yellow post-it-note next to a headline.  
  
Then he looked back at his phone.  
  
And eventually he opened up the conversation.  
  
**Unknown number, 14:18:  
** Hi Isak  
  
**Unknown number, 14:18:  
** It’s Even  
  
**Unknown number, 14:19:  
** Jonas told me to text you because you need help?? What’s up?   
  
Isak stared at the emoji with the stuck-out tongue.  
He didn’t believe that people actually used that smiley. Apparently they did.  
Or… at least Even did.  
  
And that’s when he really _really_ **really** started to realize.  
  
Even had texted him.  
  
He blinked at his phone, half expecting the messages to just disappear. Because he _had_ to imagine this scenario (even though he would never admit that to anyone). There was no way it could be real.  
  
However the words stayed on the screen, right in front of him.  
  
_Jonas told me to text you because you need help?_  
What the fuck. It was the only thing Isak could think of right there.  
He didn’t need any help. He hadn’t asked for help.  
  
Why would Jonas say something like that?  
  
And more important: What was he supposed to answer?  
  
His fingers hovered over the letters. For a few seconds he just stared. The cursor blinking at him almost mockingly.  
  
Usually, Isak would talk to Jonas in situations like this.  
He’d ask him what he was supposed to do, when he had no fucking clue at all.  
  
But now? It wasn’t an option. Because Jonas had gotten him into all of this.  
(And he also really didn’t want to talk about Even, because Jonas would only give him _that_ look again, with raised eyebrows and a smile spread all over his lips).  
  
_“i didn’t”_ he started typing, but he couldn’t even finish the sentence.  
  
The teacher entered the room again and he put away his phone immediately. Now it was even more important that she didn’t keep his phone for the weekend – or he would probably burst because of that restless (and kind of excited) feeling inside his chest.  
  
He wasn’t able to focus properly on any of the explanations for the rest of class, no matter how hard he tried.  
He knew it’d probably take him quite some work to catch up on the topic – but he couldn’t help his thoughts always trailing back to the messages that made his phone feel heavy in his pocket.  
  
So, instead of listening, he desperately thought of something to say, something that made him look at least slightly put together (and not as if Evens text had caught him completely off guard).  
  
Even though that was exactly the case. Nobody had to know.  
  
As soon as the teacher announced the class to be over, he pulled out is phone again, not bothering to leave the room yet.  
  
**You, 15:21:**  
sorry i was busy. biology class  
  
**You, 15:21:**  
i didn’t ask him to  
  
He looked at the messages he had just sent. And then he added:  
  
**You, 15:21:**  
not that i don’t want you to text me or something  
  
**You,  15:21:**  
i don’t mind  
  
**You, 15:22:**  
it’s just that i didn’t ask Jonas to tell you to text me soooooo  
  
Isak knew that he was rambling and he knew that Evens phone would blow up with texts now, but he already hit send, so there really was no way back now.  
  
Instead of thinking about it too much, he then put away his phone and started shoving his books into his bag.  
  
When he stepped out of the room into the hallway most students were gone already. Of course they were. Who would voluntarily stay in school longer than they had to?  
  
Isak headed towards his locker, his bag casually slung over one of his shoulders.  
A part of him tried to mentally prepare for the fight against the metal door, tried to get ready for the thumps of his fist against it, for the perfect annoyed glare.  
  
When he felt his phone buzzing in the pocket of his jacket, he tried not to check it right away.  
  
In the end, though? He did.  
  
He pulled out his phone as soon as he reached the right floor, placing his backpack on the ground in front of the lockers.  
  
**Unknown number, 15:23:**  
oh ok  
so no need for my help?   
  
Even seemed to be really into the use of emojis.  
Isak couldn’t help but smile a tiny bit at that. And when he realized what he did, he quickly glanced around.  
  
A group of four girls was standing nearby, but they didn’t look in his direction. He wasn’t even sure if they had noticed him. Good.  
  
So he turned back to his phone.  
  
**You, 15:23:**  
nope  
i mean if you know anything about catabolism that’d be fucking great  
  
**Unknown number, 15:24:**  
the only thing I remember when it comes to catabolism is that there are things called succinates  
laughed my ass off when I heard it for the first time  
  
**You, 15:24:  
** wow  
  
**Unknown number, 15:24:**  
I mean? _Succ_ inate? Come on!!!   
  
**You, 15:24:**  
…  
  
**Unknown number, 15:25:**  
succ  
  
**You, 15:25:**  
it isn’t that funny  
  
**Unknown number, 15:25:**  
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  
  
**Unknown number, 15:25:  
** so you didn’t smile?  
  
Isak tried to make the corners of his lips relax again.  
And even though Isak didn’t need any help, even though he didn’t ask Jonas to give Even his number, he ended up texting him as he tried to open his locker with his left hand.  
  
**You, 15:26:**  
tell me, why are you that excited about succinates at… what time?  
  
Getting the locker to open was easier than this morning. In fact, it was so much easier, that he could put his books and folders inside the small space after a few seconds. And for a short moment he wondered:   _why the hell was it cooperating?_  
Then, he shut the door.  
Again: without any problems. Again: wondering.  
  
**You, 15:28:**  
half past six?  
  
**Unknown number, 15:28:  
** Did it take you two minutes to figure out what time it is here?  
  
**You, 15:28:**  
no??????  
  
**Unknown number, 15:28:**  
sure   
  
**You, 15:28:**  
i was actually putting my notebooks away, thank you  
  
**Unknown number, 15:28:  
**  
  
**You, 15:29:  
** i’m leaving **  
** bye even  
  
**Unknown number, 15:29:  
** You can’t actually end a written conversation  
  
**Unknown number, 15:29:  
** Nothing is going to stop me from talking to you  
  
**Unknown number, 15:29:  
** I mean you could block me  
  
**Unknown number, 15:29:  
** Are you going  to block me, Isak?  
  
**Unknown number, 15:30:  
** Isak?  
  
**Unknown number, 15:32:  
**  
  
**Unknown number, 15:32:  
**  
  
**Unknown number, 15:32:  
**  
  
**Unknown number, 15:33:  
**  
  
**You, 15:35:  
** how are you even real?  
  
**Unknown number, 15:35:  
** Because I’m so dreamy?  
  
**You, 15:35:  
** oh my god  
  
**Unknown number, 15:36  
** you did not say no  
  
**You, 15:36:  
** I will walk home now.  
  
**Unknown number, 15:36:  
** talk to you later?   
  
**You, 15:37:  
** ttyl  
  
As he walked home he tried not to read through the texts again and again. However, he failed miserably.  
He scrolled back and forth and bit his lip to keep himself from smiling. And in order not to send another text, he just saved Evens number instead.  
  
Back in the flat Isak managed to watch two entire _Narcos_ episodes and even to start reading through his biology notes, as his phone buzzed.  
He immediately unlocked it.  
  
**Magnus, 18:13:**  
Party at Martins’ today!!!! U coming?  
  
He tried not to feel disappointed.  
  
**You, 18:13:**  
nahh i’m skyping with jonas later  
  
**Magnus, 18:13:**  
emma is coming dude  
  
Isak felt like laughing. Because Magnus telling him that Emma would be there to get him to join them?  
There was no way that fact made him want to go to that party more.  
Attending a party Emma went to as well only meant trying to avoid her all evening.  
Not that he didn’t like Emma. She was nice. Quite Funny. Pretty. But also too loud and too talkative and… he just really wasn’t into her. _At all.  
_  
**You, 18:14:**  
sorry, man, i promised  
  
**Magnus, 18:15:**  
scuks  
you’re missing out!  
  
With that he put away his phone, trying to focus on biology again. It worked for approximately twenty minutes.  
Then he gave up (because after all, it was _friday_ and he had enough time to deal with it some other time), grabbed his phone again and opened Jonas’ Instagram.  
  
He saw pictures of rainy streets and various neon lights, surrounded by the darkness of the night. He saw a picture of the skate park Jonas had told him about.  
And he saw the picture of his best friend, Alex and Even at the space needle.  
  
Isak scrolled through the likes again. He still couldn’t find an account that fit Even.  
So he sighed and let his phone fall onto his mattress.  
  
He didn’t know how much time had passed when Eskild knocked on his door and entered his room just a second later. “Noora, Linn and I want to watch a movie. Are you in?”  
  
He continued to stare at the ceiling.  
  
“We ordered _pizza_.”  
Eskild almost sang the last word.  
  
At that, he hummed.  
“Hawaiian?” Isak asked and Eskild grinned.  
“You should thank me.”  
  
His phone stayed on his bed, as Isak rolled his eyes and got up, a small smirk on his face.  
“Thanks.”  
  
They ended up watching _Moana_ (“again? Didn’t you watch that movie like 4 times in the past two weeks, Eskild?” – “yeah, but both Noora and you haven’t seen it yet, so we _have_ to watch it”) and eating Pizza.  
He hid under the blankets to cover up the tears filling his eyes when the music reached its heights, Te Kā stopping in front of Moana.  
_You know who you are._  
  
If anyone had noticed the crying part, they didn’t say anything and really, Isak was glad.  
  
After _Moana_ , they watched _Tangled_ once again (“because once you’ve started an evening with watching Disney movies you can’t go back, Isak, that’s how the rules go!”)     
When the movie was over Eskild had fallen asleep on his shoulder and Noora, Linn and Isak himself tried their best to carry him to his room without waking him up.  
Surprisingly, they did it.  
  
And when Isak finished helping the girls cleaning up the living room he went back to his room.  
  
He had totally forgotten about his phone until he saw it lying abandoned on the mattress.  
For a second he just stayed where he was, staring, barely blinking. The feeling in his chest was back.  
  
Then he eventually flopped down next to the phone, grabbing and unlocking it a tad later.  
A bunch of messages flooded his lock screen.  
  
He first checked the “bros before hoes  <333” chat. He mostly scanned the texts quickly.  
Magnus and Mahdi spammed the conversation with drunk-party-texts.  
  
**Magnus, 21:58:**  
omgmahdi that one gir is totally checking me out  
  
**Mahdi, 22:06:**  
which one  
  
**Magnus, 22:08:**  
she’s kissing a girl???? Threesome?!?!?!?!  
  
**Jonas, 22:11:**  
you wish  
  
**Magnus** , **22:11:**  
Jonas!!!!!  hows skyping with isak  
  
**Jonas, 22:11:  
** we’re not skyping rn?  
  
**Magnus, 22:12:  
**  
  
**Jonas, 22:12:  
**?  
  
**Magnus, 22:12:  
** I FEEL BETRAYED ISAK   
  
**Jonas 22:13:  
**?  
  
**Mahdi, 22:15:**  
?  
  
**You, 22:24:  
** chill, Jonas and I want to skype at eleven  
  
**Magnus, 22:24:  
** oh ok  
  
Then, there were texts from Even. And when he opened them, he felt his hands getting clammy.  
He stared down at his phone and licked his lips.  
  
**Even, 19:01:**  
now is later  
  
**Even, 19:01:**  
are you busy?  
  
**Even, 19:07:**  
I guess you are   
text me when you feel like it   
  
**Even, 20:38:**  
I was hoping for you to entertain me during biology class. Succinates and all.  
But now I’m sitting here, actually having to pay attention  
okay I’m not doing too well at that  
  
**Even, 21:20:**  
Hope you’re alright   
  
Isak smiled. Even if he tried to deny it. He definitely smiled.  
  
**You, 22:26:**  
you shouldn’t text during class, you know  
  
**Even, 22:27:**  
you’re alive!!!!!!  
  
**You, 22:27:**  
are you still in class?  
  
**Even, 22:27:**  
nope, just got out, so am I allowed to text you now?   
  
**You, 22:28:**  
i guess  
  
**Even, 22:28:**  
you’re so enthusiastic about talking to me  
I am flattered, Isak  
  
**You, 22:29:**  
you should be. I normally don’t answer unknown numbers.  
  
**Even, 22:29:**  
are you saying I’m special?  
this is all going a little fast, don’t you think?  
I’m so nervous!!   
  
**You, 22:29:**  
you are so weird  
  
**Even, 22:29:**  
in a good way?  
  
**You, 22:29:**  
more like  
in a weird way  
  
**Even, 22:29:**  
And still you keep replying.  
  
**Even, 22:31:**  
Really? Now you’re not replying anymore?  
  
**Even, 22:32:**  
Have we reached that point of conversation again?  
  
**You, 22:32:**  
maybe  
  
**Even, 22:33:  
**  
  
They spent the next few minutes exchanging messages non-stop.  
And for some reason it felt natural. It felt easy.  
There was nothing forced in the conversation. Just light jokes and their nonsense of sentences.  
  
**Even, 22:49:**  
just got home from school  
Jonas said you two are going to skype in ten minutes?  
  
**You, 22:49:**  
yeah, our usual skype catch up  
  
**Even, 22:49:**  
nice  
  
**Even, 22:50:**  
maybe I’m going to say hello if you’re lucky   
  
**You, 22:51:**  
if i’m lucky?  
  
**Even, 22:52:**  
I don’t just show up in _random_ skype sessions, Isak.  
I do it with style **and** with reason.  
  
**You, 22:52:**  
what’s your reason for the last few times then?  
  
**Even, 22:53:**  
_destiny  
  
_**You, 22:53:**  
destiny? what the fuck  
  
**Even, 22:53:**  
see you in a bit  
  
And they did see each other.  
  
Isak skyped with Jonas for ten minutes, when Even walked into the kitchen casually, grabbing a waterbottle before he sat down next to his best friend.  
For some reason, Jonas didn’t even seem surprised. He just grinned as Even greeted Isak with a smile that made his eyes crinkle a little.  
  
A part of Isak couldn’t help but melt.  
  
It became a thing, the two of them texting all week, sharing random thoughts and situations.  
And more often than not Isak found himself smiling at the messages he received, even though he knew that he shouldn’t be so happy about it.  
After all Even had disappeared on him for weeks without giving explanation.  
  
But when he read all those texts, when he woke up to a message saying _“I know, it’s almost midnight here, but you’re going to wake up in a bit, so, good morning. Have a nice day ”_ he couldn’t help but push all those negative thoughts away for now.  
  
Even started showing up during skype sessions even more regularly and at some point he always sat down next to Jonas and the three of them chatted, talking about whatever things.  
It was light and warm and for some reason, it felt familiar. Like it had always been this way.  
  
Isak was sitting next to Mahdi and Magnus in the cantina at one o’clock, when his phone buzzed once again.  
He opened the message from Even a second later.  
  
**Even, 14:48:**  
Hey, how do you feel about skyping later? Jonas and Alex are on a school trip, so I thought we could, you know, just talk, if you want to.  
  
This time, his smile grew even bigger than usual.  
“Yo, dude, are you texting Emma?” Magnus asked with an amused grin.  
“Fuck no”, he muttered under his breath, as he started typing a reply.  
  
**You, 14:48:**  
yeah, sure   
  
**Even, 14:48:**  
A smiley? Who are you??!!   
  
“Why are you smiling like this, then?” This time it was Mahdi asking, tilting his head slightly.  
Isak knew that he couldn’t deny it. So he just shrugged.  
As he typed again, he didn’t see Magnus and Mahdi exchanging questioning looks.  
  
**You, 14:49:**  
oh shut up  
when are you free?  
  
**Even, 14:49:**  
ten o’clock oslo?  
  
**You, 14:49:**  
alright  
  
**Even, 14:50:**  
can’t wait 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Additional information: Even is still repeating his final grade, but on the weekend he works in a small café.
> 
> Also I want to thank all of you for leaving comments and kudos on this fic. It honestly means the world to me!  
> Even though I barely respond on here (you can, however, come and say hi on my tumblr @aceteroid, if you want to!!) I still highly appreciate the feedback very very very much!  
> (Imagine me jumping around my room and screaming happily every time I get a notification).
> 
> Another thing I wanted to get out there is that I'm sorry for making you wait.  
> School is keeping me busy these days (only a month left until I have to write my final exams, ugh).
> 
> I will still try to upload once a week, though!


	6. Chapter 6

For the rest of the day Isak was so excited that he barely managed to hold still.   
During his last lesson – ninety minutes of maths (aka ninety minutes of pure suffering and seemingly infinite misery) – he kept spinning his pen between his fingers, moving his feet up and down at the same time as he looked at the board, where the teacher had written down some example.   
He didn’t understand shit, the variables didn’t make sense to him at all, were more like a riddle in itself, even though the example was meant to make things clearer.   
But right now? He couldn’t care less.   
Instead he just grinned as he scribbled down the notes.  
  
He only stopped, when the guy next to him asked him to “fuck off, smiley-face, I can’t concentrate if you’re acting like a damn bouncy ball”.  
(And even then it was hard for him to control himself, because his thoughts kept drifting and the smile always returned, which made the movements of his hands and his legs follow at some point).   
  
When he met Magnus and Mahdi on the schoolyard after class, he still couldn’t shake the babbling enthusiasm off his chest. So he smiled his huge smile as he greeted the two boys.  
“Halla.”  
“Okaaay, dude. Why the hell are you so happy? I mean, it’s great that you’re happy, don’t get me wrong, but what the fuck?” Mahdi asked, when Isak started standing on his tiptoes, before standing normally again, standing on his tiptoes, standing normally, standing on his tiptoes, standing normally.  
“What did you smoke and _why didn’t you share_?” Magnus laughed, eyeing Isak with an amused look.  
“I just feel good.” Isak shrugged, as he pulled out his phone, re-reading the last messages Even had sent him.  
  
**Even, 16:37:**  
I’m writing a sociology quiz in twenty minutes, so I should probably go through my notes again  
(even though I would rather continue talking)  
(don’t tell my sociology teacher, he’d be pissed. He thinks it’s my favourite subject)  
I guess you have to survive without me for now  
Wish me luck   
  
**Even, 16:38:**  
Oh and before I forget it: what’s your skype name?   
So I can add you later  
  
**You, 16:38:**  
It’s Isakyaki  
good luck with the quiz, you can do it  
  
“And that’s why you keep staring at your phone?” Mahdi had his hands in the pockets of his jackets, as he looked at him with raised eyebrows and a small smirk on his lips.   
“What is this, an interrogation?!” He couldn’t help but let out a laugh while saying it.   
“Oh, I can use my mobile flashlight and we can play good cop/bad cop!” Magnus looked at Mahdi with an excited expression, before he added: “I’m the bad one.”  
Mahdi blinked at him, then, with a chuckle: “What the fuck, Magnus, is this something you dreamed of again?  
“Not until Vilde shows up with a whip”, Isak remarked.   
“God, she was so hot”, Magnus groaned in response and Isak shook his head with a grin.  
“You say that about every chick.”  
“Because chicks **are** hot!”  
  
Like that, Magnus started talking about the brunette girl he had almost made out with during the last party (at least, before she had started kissing her girlfriend right in front of him), as they left the school and walked towards the tram station.  
  
                               
  
At home, he threw his backpack onto his bed, before he put his Spofity on shuffle and started rummaging through the cabinets in the kitchen.  
Normally he would have bought Kebab together with Jonas, as almost every Thursday.  
Now however, the leftover mac and cheese in the fridge had to do it.  
He popped it into the microwave and nodded his head to the sound of NAS’ _The World Is Yours_ that filled the room out of his bad phone speakers.  
A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips.  
  
The time, though, it felt like it didn’t pass at all.   
After eating (and even washing-up!!!!) he sat down at his desk and did his homework. 18:56.  
Then he started making notes for the upcoming biology test he had to write in two weeks. He read through the catabolism twice, used various highlighters. A few post it notes. Sana would be proud.   
19:32.  
Noora walked into his room, thanking Isak for cleaning the kitchen since it actually was her turn to do it. Maybe that was the reason she didn’t complain about him eating the leftovers.   
19:35.   
“No problem, I had time anyway, soooooo…”  
19:35.  
Eventually he ended up re-watching a few episodes of South Park and then Stranger Things, just to make the time go by faster.  
21:43.  
  
He had about fifteen more minutes to spend so he scrolled through their texts one more time, even though he knew it was a little weird to hold onto typed words that much.   
And as he read and read and read the messages they had sent, the little _“good mornings”_ and _“good nights”_ , he started to get a nervous.  
  
He licked his lips and ran a hand through his hair, feeling it flattened at the right sight of his head, just above his ear.  
A sigh escaped him. Of _fucking_ course.   
While he had lain on his bed he had messed it up.   
Not, that he normally cared about his hair. He didn’t.   
  
But right now? He wanted to look somewhat decent, because…  
  
Because…   
  
Why exactly did he want to look alright?   
It was just Even.   
Even knew how he looked. He had seen him already. Had seen him in that dirty black shirt with the spaghetti-sauce-stain. Had seen him in his pyjamas.   
He shouldn’t overthink it.  
  
He shouldn’t. But he did. At least, a little.   
  
So he still stood up and checked his face in the mirror by his closet.   
There were pillow marks on his cheek and the usual bags under his eyes.   
He pinched the skin for a moment, then made a face, before Isak walked back to his bed and started skype.  
  
The well-known starting sound filled his room and he was greeted by a friend request.  
_Even Bech N_ _æ_ _sheim._   
  
For a second he just stared at the boy’s profile picture. He was standing in front of a window, wearing a black shirt. The sun hit his face just right and he was smiling.  
Isak’s heartbeat quickened and he felt ridiculous, but he couldn’t help it.  
  
To keep himself from staring, he accepted the request.  
And only a second later he was greeted by an incoming call.  
  
He closed his eyes and took a last deep breath.  
Then he accepted it and the window popped open.  
  
The first thing Isak noticed was that the surroundings were different. Not the usual kitchen, but light walls with a few pictures pinned on them and a high shelf full of DVDs.   
  
Even was smiling at him.  
  
And Isak really wanted to smile back, but the first, one, two, three seconds, he just stared.  
Because Even was wearing a dark grey shirt that clung just right to his shoulders and a deep red snapback that covered his blond hair. A few strands were falling into his forehead nevertheless. It felt like a déja-vu.   
Isak blinked. Because he knew the snapback.   
It was the snapback he had given Jonas for Christmas last year. The snapback he had worn a few times already. And now it sat on Evens head, turned backwards, looking like it belonged there.   
Really, it was unfair.  
Even could wear anything and look good.  
  
Eventually he noticed that he had to _do_ something. So Isak smiled.  
  
“You’re early”, he greeted.  
“well, so are you”, Even replied, a teasing tone to his voice.  
“I didn’t call five minutes early, though.”  
“However you came online, that’s quite the same, if you ask me”  
  
He grinned. And so did Even.  
  
“How was school?” Isak asked and Even leaned back into the pillows he had propped behind him.  
“Way too long. Felt like time didn’t pass at all.”  
“Tell me about it.”  
“Why? Have you been waiting for this moment?” Even raised his eyebrows, looking amused and god, was he attractive.  
Isak rolled his eyes, but he still the corners of his mouth turned upwards.  
  
“Oh, how did the test go?”  
“You know. Just another test. It was alright. I guess. I hope. I pray. Whatever.”  
Even shrugged and Isak nodded for a moment, leaning back as well.  
  
There was silence and they looked at each other until Even sat up abruptly.  
  
“Is that NAS playing in the… Did you finally listen to him?!” He was smiling even more brightly now, the smile that made his eyes crinkle.   
Isak blushed a bit: “I already knew him!”  
“Of course. How did you like _Illmatic_?”  
“It’s a fucking masterpiece. I have the songs stuck in my head all the time.”  
“Me too! Almost as much as Gabrielle.”  
  
Isak stared at Even.  
  
“Gabrielle?”  
  
Even shrugged, a smirk on his (so freaking full) lips.  
  
“Her songs are not that bad. I mean _ring meg_ or _5 fine fr_ _økner_?”  
As if Even wanted to convince him, he started humming the last song, bobbing his head.  
  
“Are you serious right now?”  
“You don’t like her?” Even asked, his eyebrows raised, as he continued humming.  
  
Isak just stared some more.   
Because how could this unbelievably handsome guy with the dark red snapback and the grey shirt actually _like_ Gabrielle?   
  
Evens smirk became wider and for a second he dropped his gaze and focused on his laptop instead.  
Then, the song started playing. Bad audio quality and all.  
  
Isak hid his face in his hands automatically, trying to cover his blush, as Even started lip-syncing.  
When he looked up a few seconds later (hoping, that he was in control of the colour of his cheeks) he saw Even completely lost in the moment, smiling _his_ smile.  
Isak returned it.  
  
“You like it!” Even then exclaimed, almost victoriously.  
  
  


“Okay, so what’s your favourite movie?” Even asked him, as he crossed his arms in front of his chest, a look full of expectations.   
“What, are you some sort of movie snob?”  
His eyes wandered towards the shelf to Evens left. Maybe the question was kind of unnecessary.  
  
“Just answer, Isak, this could change our entire relationship.”  
“Relationsh-”  
“Just answer.”  
“Fine.” Isak sighed and looked towards the ceiling for a moment, thinking of the movies he liked. “Uh… Inception, I guess?”  
  
There was a pause. For a moment Isak thought he had said the wrong thing.   
The two boys looked at each other.  
  
Then:  
“I can deal with that, I mean, at least you didn’t say…”  
“or transformers”, Isak added.  
“ISAK!!” Even stared at him in disbelief.  
“What?!”  
“YOU CAN’T JUST SAY TRANSFORMERS!”  
“Why not? It’s a good film and –“  
“A good film? Michael Bay? That is a paradox. God, I can’t be into you anymore. You have no taste in movies. Transformers. Pff.” Even muttered the last few words under his breath, shaking his head.  
  
But Isak couldn’t pay attention to that.  
Because his thoughts only focused on the _I can’t be into you anymore_ part.   
Even was into him.  
  
He looked down at his hands. And he smiled.  
Even was into him.  
  
“What’s a good movie then, in your opinion?” Isak asked.  
Almost as nothing had happened. As it wasn’t a big deal.  
  
Even was into him.  
  
“How much time do you have?”   
Even tilted his head, looking at him with the corners of his lips slightly turned upwards.  
  
Isak checked the clock. It was already past twelve and he knew, he had to get up at seven, so he really should sleep. But instead he said:  
“Some more.”  
“You have Netflix, right?”  
  
Isak nodded.  
  
“Okay, look _‘Romeo + Juliet’_ up. We’ll start on three.”  
  
And that way they spent the next two hours with a movie Isak would have never watched on his own.   
Because normally? Normally he didn’t like love stories.   
He wasn’t interested in cliché storylines and the unrealistic ways the protagonists fell in love.  
But when he watched the movie with Even and Even kept sharing little facts or sometimes just a _“this scene! Look at this scene, it’s absolutely epic. My favourite by far!”_ with him, he couldn’t help but like it.  
  
He couldn’t help but fall for the plot and the way one thing lead to another. And when the final scene took place a few tears found their way down his cheeks.  
Isak quickly wiped them away, then took a glance at the skype window to check if Even had noticed.  
  
When the closing credits rolled in he let out a small huff, staring at the ceiling for a moment.  
  
“I won’t tell anyone that you cried”, Even said and Isak shifted his head to look at the older boy who was thousands of miles away.  
“I didn’t cry”, he said without even thinking about it twice, a small grin on his face.  
“And you knew NAS before I told you about him.”  
“Ja?!”  
“Okay.” They both smiled. “You should sleep”, Even then added.  
“Yeah… Good, uh.. Good night, then.”  
“Good night, Isak.” Evens voice seemed a little softer and a part of him melted at that.  
“Good night”, he repeated.  
  
Even did his little weave and Isak mirrored it, before they ended the call.  
The sound of hanging up did something to Isak.  
  
It felt real. He had spent over four hours with Even and it had been easy and unburdened. As soon as they had started talking the nervous feeling in his chest had been gone.  
Isak didn’t know how Even had done it. But he didn’t need to.  
  
He closed his laptop and put it away, before he got out of his bed to step out of his jeans and put on something more comfortable.  
  
As soon as he had tucked himself under his blankets he grabbed his phone. There were a few new messages, but for now, he only opened the conversation with Even.  
  
**Even, 02:26:**  
Sorry for keeping you awake  
  
**You, 02:27:**  
don’t worry about it  
s alright  
  
**Even, 02:27:**  
maybe we could do that again sometime  
  
**You, 02:27:**  
keeping me awake?  
  
**Even, 02:27:**  
if that means skyping  
yeah  
  
**You, 02:27:**  
I’d like that  
  
**Even, 02:27:**  
  
  
**You, 02:28:**  
were you wearing Jonas snapback?  
  
**Even, 02:28:**  
yeah, he let me borrow it   
  
**You, 02:28:**  
it suits you  
  
**Even, 02:30:**  
good night, Isak   
  
**You, 02:30:**  
good night even

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments make my day, thanks so much for the support <3


	7. Chapter 7

His alarm made him slowly blink his eyes open with a grunt.   
It felt like he had fallen asleep only minutes ago and the surrounding darkness of his room seemed to confirm his thoughts.    
  
At first he didn’t move at all, still wrapped in his blankets like a burrito. It felt all warm and fuzzy and comfortable (at least if he ignored the buzzing phone).   
Then, seconds later, he pressed the slumber button without thinking about it twice. _Just a few more minutes_.   
  
He closed his eyes again.  
  
When the alarm went off again he **knew** he had to do something -  _Get up, take a quick shower and cycle to school_ -, because he **knew**  he wouldn’t make it to the tram in time anymore.  
  
But instead of leaving the bed right away he grabbed his phone, checking his messages first.   
He was aware that he was being the _typical_ teenager, all caught up in his technological world, dependent on his phone as soon as he woke up, but when he saw that Even had texted him two hours ago? He didn’t give two shits about fitting into some stereotype.  
  
**Even, 05:01:**  
I know you’re sleeping  
but can you believe that we could have met if I hadn’t ended up moving to Seattle?    
I can’t stop thinking about it  
  
**you, 07:27:**   
it’s bizarre, isn’t it  
  
**Even, 07:27:**  
you’re awake god morn  
  
**Even, 07:28:**  
and yeah, right???   
I mean we could have met on the streets or in a library or during some party  
  
**you, 07:28:**  
maybe we did  
  
**you, 07:28:**  
i mean in some parallel universe  
  
**Even, 07:29:**  
Parallel universe?   
  
**you, 07:29:**  
a parallel universe where you never left Oslo  
  
**Even, 07:29:**  
maybe, in a parallel universe, I ask you to dance with me, at that party.  
  
**you, 07:30:**  
I don’t dance  
  
**Even, 07:31:**  
that’s a High School Musical reference Isak, I hope you are aware  
  
**you, 07:31:  
** what? no i have never even seen that movie  
  
**Even, 07:31:**  
are you telling me that you’ve seen Transformers, but not High School Musical!??!?!?!?!??????  
  
**you, 07:32:**  
movie snob  
  
**Even, 07:32:**  
you know what, maybe I wouldn’t ask you to dance with me  
  
**you, 07:32:**  
no?  
  
**Even, 07:32:  
** nope  
i think we are more likely to meet in… I don’t know…   
a bathroom or something anyway  
  
**you, 07:33:**  
a _bathroom_?  
  
**Even, 07:33:**  
yeah  
I’d grab all the paper towels to get your attention  
  
**you, 07:33:  
**_faen_ , you’re so weird   
  
**Even, 07:33:  
** For you   
  
**you, 07:34:**  
god  
  
**Even, 07:35:**  
I can basically see you rolling your eyes   
and I’m all the way over here in Seattle  
7000km away  
  
**you, 07:35:  
** you are  
  
**Even, 07:35** :  
I kind of wish I wasn't, though  
  
He stared down at the text and his heart made a little (a big) jump.   
Even was into him.   
He couldn’t think about anything else.   
When he had first heard it, it had almost felt surreal. A part of Isak still thought he was being messed with. A big fucking joke. Hidden cameras and all.   
But then: Even was so genuine, so sincere that he just held onto the boy’s words.  
Because he wanted to believe him.  
Because fuck the _I’m not gay_ -thoughts. He definitely was gay. At least when it came to Even.   
So he smiled as he licked his lips, about to type a reply (that hopefully wouldn’t sound too amazed), when he noticed the time.   
  
**you, 07:37:**   
fuck, I have to leave  
  
**you, 07:37:**  
I’m sorry  
I really am  
  
**you, 07:37:  
** I totally forgot the time  
school starts in 20 minutes and I need like 15 minutes to get there  
  
**you, 07:38:**  
soooo  
  
**you, 07:38:**  
I’ll talk to you later?  
  
**Even, 07:38:**  
okay, yeah, sure  
  
**you, 07:38:**   
  
  
Isak entered (or more like sprinted into) the classroom right before his history teacher, who eyed him over his glasses as he sat down at his usual table. His breathing was too loud and too uneven, yes, but he wasn’t late, so there was nothing he could be accused of.   
When the class started, he paid attention, until the teacher started writing down dates on the board. He wouldn’t remember them anyway, so he pulled out his phone eventually.  
  
**you, 08:08:**  
maybe, in a parallel universe, i say yes when you ask me to dance.   
  
**you, 08:08:**  
despite hating it.  
  
**you, 08:08:**  
but since we meet in a bathroom  
  
**Even, 08:08:**  
it will be more like in our universe here?  
  
**you, 08:09:**  
?  
  
**Even, 08:09:**  
you staring at me   
  
He started typing, trying to deny it (even though he knew that Even was right, of course he was), when:  
  
**Even, 08:09:**  
I know you were, don’t even try saying something else  
  
**you, 08:10:**  
pff  
  
**Even, 08:10:**  
  
  
**you, 08:10:**  
but yes, i’d probably stare  
  
**Even, 08:10:**  
  
  
**you, 08:11:  
** because taking all the fucking paper towels isn’t normal  
  
**Even, 08:11:**  
and because you think I am handsome  
  
**you, 08:11:  
** you heard that?  
  
**Even, 08:12:**  
  
  
**you, 08:12:  
** …  
  
**you, 08:12:**  
  
  
                               
  
They skyped again that night, because Isak’s sleep rhythm is completely fucked up anyway (and of course, he knows that’s not the only reason, but he doesn’t quite want to admit how gone he is already, not after only one and a half months).  
  
“Are you planning on hosting a cooking show, now that you can’t direct actual movies yet?”, he asked with a grin as Even placed his Laptop on a kitchen counter. He looked at him, winking for a moment. “Oh, what I do, to keep you entertained.”  
  
Isak laughed softly, as he watched Even taking vegetables out of the fridge. Peppers and onions and mushrooms and tomatoes. Then he started cutting them and Isak couldn’t help but realize how smoothly the knife moved (while he tried not to stare at Evens hands for too long, at the delicate fingers – he failed).  
  
“So, chef Even, what culinary feast awaits me?”  
  
Even looked up from cutting an onion, smirking slightly.   
“An omelette”, he answered eventually and Isak raised his eyebrows.  
“Absolutely extravagant. I am impressed by your skill level.” His tone was teasing and Even cocked his head at his words, eyes crinkling as he smiled.   
“At least I’m not living on half-frozen pizza only.”  
“Hello, did you forget about the Mac and Cheese I told you about yesterday?”  
“ _Oh, pardon_ ”, Even said and Isak’s heartbeat quickened at Even speaking French. How the hell was it even possible that one simple word could sound this good?  
“I forgot about the leftover Mac and Cheese _your roommate_ cooked three days ago”, he then added.  
They both grinned widely, so much, that the corners of his mouth started hurting a little bit. He didn’t mind, though.  
“You should be sorry. It was good.”  
“I bet it’s not as good as my perfection of an omelette.”  
“Perfection, huh?”  
“Totally, I mean, I would let you taste it, but…”  
  
Even shrugged and a barely noticeable sigh escaped Isak’s lips. Distance sucked.  
  
Even went back to cutting the vegetables in silence and before Isak could say anything else, Jonas entered the kitchen.  
He saw his best friend frowning at the situation and really, it was understandable, because how often did you walk in on your best friend and your exchange student’s step-brother skyping?   
  
He could feel his cheeks heating up and when Even looked at the laptop for a second, he grinned: “Were you checking me out or why are you-“  
He then noticed Jonas.    
  
And Jonas? He had raised his eyebrows, hands in the pockets of his jeans.   
“Hi”, he heard him say and Even and Isak echoed it almost in sync.   
  
Quiet stretched out between the three of them.  
  
“So, I guess you _did_ steal him away from me, huh?” Jonas asked and he could see how Evens shoulders relaxed a bit. His lips turned upwards.  
“No one can resist my charms.”  
  
Isak let out a low, embarrassed groan, as he buried his face in his arms in order to hide not just his blush, but also his smile.   
  
                               
  
When Isak and Jonas skyped a day later, he managed to keep the words inside his head for seventeen entire minutes, feeling a heavy, almost unbearable weight on his shoulders, before he blurted out:  
  
“I like Even.”  
  
And when the words were out, hanging in between the countries, he felt like they got lost in the middle of the ocean, because Jonas just looked at him.  
  
Then he nodded.  
  
He didn’t say anything and Isak didn’t need him to, since he was sure that Jonas had already known anyway. Because   
a) Jonas knew him, they were best friends since the age of five, therefore it wasn’t unusual that the boy knew Isak’s thoughts better than himself sometimes.  
And b) Jonas had given his number to Even in the first place. He must have had a reason for that.  
  
For a moment, Isak fiddled with the sleeves of his hoodie, pulled them over his hands until his fingertips were the only things visible under the fabric.  
  
“That’s good”, Jonas started and their gazes met.  
“It is?” he asked and Jonas nodded once again.  
“Of course it is. I mean... He _is_ handsome.”  
He blinked at his best friend and eventually a smirk reached his thin lips: “What?!”  
“Come on, you said so yourself, I’m just agreeing, here!”  
  
They both laughed at that and when they stopped at some point, the two of them still grinning slightly, Jonas continued:  
  
“So, what’s the deal with the both of you now?”  
He shrugged: “I don’t really know, we haven’t talked about it yet.”  
“You should.”  
  
Another pause.  
  
“I know. I guess I’m just a bit… afraid?”  
“Why?”  
Jonas voice was soft and once again he knew why he called him his best friend. They just worked. They understood when the other needed a little push or when he needed some space. It was always the right thing.  
For a second, he wondered why he hadn’t talked to him earlier.  
  
“I never felt like this before”, Isak admitted, looking down at his hands.  
Jonas let out a soft hum, gesturing for Isak to continue.  
“I mean, it’s not about him being a boy. I accepted that. Sort of. I think.”  
He looked up at the laptop screen to see Jonas watching him, his chin propped up on his left hand.  
“I just- He is in Seattle. Fucking America. Over 7000 kilometres away. How is this supposed to work? Even if he visits me or I go to Seattle, after saving for years or something, our time together still would be limited somehow…   
Just- How do people deal with that? I have never been in an actual relationship, so how am I supposed to know how to act in a long-distance one?!”  
He licked his lips and tried to look for an answer in his best friends face, even though he knew that it wasn’t possible to find one.  
  
“You fell for him without meeting him in person once, Isak”, Jonas said after a few seconds.  
And he nodded, because what else was he supposed to do? Yes, he fell for Even. In a ridiculous short amount of time. He fell for his smirk and his laugh, he fell for the boy’s eyes, for the way he talked about the things he was passionate about, he fell for his little jokes and his teasing tone. He fell for him.   
  
“And that doesn’t happen for no reason, man. I know you. And I know that even though there is no universal formula you can use here… you’ll find a way. No idea how that way looks right now. But I don’t think it’s important. If you talk to him, you’ll figure something out. And you know why?”  
“Why?” he asked.  
“Because he is as much head over heels for you as you are for him.”  
  
  
  
After coming out to Jonas, he didn’t confront Even right away. He knew he had to do it at some point. He was aware of that.  
But for now? For now texting and talking and laughing with him _(and maybe also a little bit of flirting)_ was enough.   
  
So he skyped with Jonas and sometimes not just Even, but also Alex joined them. They talked about how different Seattle was from Oslo, the lights, the people, the parties.  
“Magnus texted me about some _fucking amazing_ party next week, are you going?” Jonas asked while Alex scrolled through his phone, looking for some song he wanted to show them.   
Even had left for work a few minutes ago, promising Isak to send him a picture of his “really cool apron”, a wink, then he was gone.  
He still felt the aftermaths of the blush on his face when he thought about it.  
“I think, yeah. Mahdi and him are sure I owe them beer, so I don’t think, I really have any other choice.” He grinned a bit, shrugging.  
“It’s good for you. Not just sitting in front of your laptop all evening”, Jonas teased and Isak rolled his eyes.  
“I’m doing it for you, asshole”, he said eventually and Jonas raised his eyebrows. “For me? Really?” The smirk on his lips was huge.   
  
His phone let out a loud _ding_ and Isak checked it so find a picture of Even in a black apron, smiling his wide smile at the camera.   
**you, 23:31:**  
  
  
**Even, 23:31:**  
  
  
He skyped with Even almost every other day, developing a routine of joking and teasing and speaking about everything they could think of.   
“So I climbed up the stairs of that really huge tower, step by step by step and when I finally reached the door, I just… woke up”, he explained, his laptop sitting on his lap.   
Even raised his eyebrows and grinned at the explanation: “You know what Sigmund Freud says about towers in dreams?”  
“OH _SHUT UP_.”  
Even laughed and the sound was absolutely perfect, like the sun and the stars and the moon, all at the very same time.  
  
Isak knew he was in love.  
  
                               
  
**you, 03:17:**  
is it possible to miss someone you’ve never met in person?   
  
**Even, 03:17:**  
well I quite much miss Buz Luhrmann from time to time, however, he doesn’t even know I exist  
  
**you, 03:17:**  
_drittsekk_  
  
**Even, 03:18:**  
I miss you, too, you know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm terrified of this coming to an end, only two more chapters to go, ahhhh!  
> Please, do leave comments and tell me what you think, I love reading them! They're basically my only driving force nowadays (which is also why I uploaded 2x this week - maybe a third time coming up, who knows????????)
> 
> Thanks for reading! x


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AYE AYE CAPTAIN, smut ahead!!!!!  
> no, but really, explicit smut in this chapter.  
> It starts at the 07:29-texts and continues until the chapter is over, in case you don't want to read that part!

He knew that it had been a stupid idea to join in the game of _truth or dare_ when Magnus had asked him to. Because Isak didn’t specifically enjoy games like this. It mostly led to awkward encounters and situations no one really wanted to be in anyway.  
So in the end? In the end he had himself to blame.  
  
When the bottle had pointed at Emma, she had exchanged quick looks with the two girls beside her. The blonde to her left had let out a thoughtful hum, followed by a grin after Emma had declared that she chose _“dare, of course”_ : “Okay let’s see… How about seven minutes in heaven with…”  
Her eyes had landed on Isak.  
  
And now they were standing in that ridiculously small closet, barely able to see each other in the dark. Emma didn’t seem to mind. Instead she just let her hand, which she had placed on his chest, trail downwards, an obvious goal in mind.  
  
_Joining that game had actually been the worst idea._  
  
She reached the waistband of his jeans, determined to continue, when he blurted out:  
“Emma, stop.”  
She raised a perfectly plugged eyebrow at him: “What is it? We still have six minutes left.”  
“I can’t do this.”  
“You don’t have to do anything”, she replied, purred almost, her tone seductively.  
She then moved to unbutton his jeans and automatically, he reached for her hand, making her stop.  
“I’m serious. I can’t do this.”  
She took a step away from him, shaking off his hand in the process. “Why? You didn’t mind kissing me last time, Isak.”  
  
He couldn’t help but notice how different his name sounded when she said it instead of Even. Harsher. More like an accusation.  
  
“That was months ago.” A pause. She looked at him expectantly so he added: “I’m with somebody else now.”  
Something in her gaze shifted. He wasn’t sure if it was disappointment or anger or maybe a little bit of both.  
Before he could say anything else she left the closet, slamming the door.  
  
Isak closed his eyes for a moment. The space still felt too small for his thoughts.  A sigh formed in his chest and left his lips shortly after.  
Without going back to the living room, where the entire game had started, he just left the house.  
  
Outside, he was greeted by silence mixed with the dulled beat of the music.  
He approached the street when he heard Mahdi and Magnus both yelling his name.  
They jogged towards him and eventually stopped, just a few meters way.  
  
“What that the fuck, man, Emma just told Lea and Maria that she wants to leave. What did you do?!” Mahdi asked, the confusion clear on his face.  
“I didn’t _do anything_.”  
“I don’t understand shit, man. Why is she upset then?”  
“Because I didn’t want her to touch me.”  
This time, it was Magnus talking: “… whaaat?! Dude, why?!”  
“I already told you that I’m not interested in her.”  
  
Isak almost sounded frustrated. It wasn’t the first time he had mentioned it. However, they still acted like it was an entirely newfound information.  
  
“And I still don’t get it! I mean, what the fuck?! I’d bang her in a second.”  
“Sure, Magnus”, he said, rolling his eyes before adding: “The thing is, I’m not you. I wouldn’t.”  
“Yeah, that still doesn’t explain it, dude.” Mahdi furrowed his brows while looking at him.  
“God.” Isak groaned and stared at his feet for a moment. Then:  
“I am into Even, okay?! That’s why I didn’t want to do it. Fuck. It feels… like some sort of cheating.”  
  
None of them talked for what felt like an eternity.  
  
“The fuck, are you a homo?!”  
Mahdi turned to look at Magnus, his words distinct: “Shut up, man, not the time.”  
“I’m just trying to understand!” Magnus exclaimed.  
Isak looked at the two of them. A shrug. “I like him. That’s everything there is to understand. That’s why I’m not interested in Emma. …Because I’m interested in him.”  
“I had no idea, man.” Magnus voice was softer now.  
“Yeah, well, it’s not like I wanted anyone to know. I didn’t even admit it to myself for a long time.”  
Mahdi nodded, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans: “So you’re not out yet? To others, I mean?”  
“I told Jonas about it a while ago, but… no, no one else knows.”  
“Does Even know?” Magnus asked.  
“That I’m gay?”  
“That you have a thing for him.”  
He licked his lips. “I… I guess. I don’t know. We haven’t spoken about it.”  
Only a second later Magnus shook his head persistently. “Fuck, man, you really should talk to him.”  
“I know.”  
“Then fucking do it, man”, Mahdi agreed.  
“I-“, Isak started, but Magnus didn’t let him continue. Instead, he said: “Just go home and tell him. Right now. Done. Not that big of a deal.”  
“I can’t just-“, he tried again, but this time it was Mahdi who interrupted him.  
“Isak. Hate to break it to you, but Magnus is right. If you’re so gone for him that you let a hot girl storm out of a closet, even though she most likely meant to get you off… You should let him know.”  
  
He nodded.  
  
And although he wasn’t even remotely close to home ten minutes after that, still kilometres away, he pulled out his phone and opened the conversation with Even.  
  
**you, 02:47:**  
even?  
  
His phone rang half a minute later and his heart almost stopped when he saw Evens name on the display (even though he knew that it was him, it was the only logical thing to happen after the message he had sent).  
  
When he accepted the call Even didn’t even wait for Isak to say something.  
“Where are you? Are you okay?” He sounded worried and Isak felt bad immediately.  
“Yes, I am, sorry, I didn’t want to scare you or anything, I only… wanted to talk to you.”  
He could almost hear how Even relaxed at his words and then there was a hint of a smile in his voice when he spoke: “It’s just… what… 3 o’clock?”  
“That never stopped us before.”  
“Right.”  
“Soooo”, Isak eventually said, drawing out the word.  
“What’s up?” Even asked.  
  
He took another deep breath.  
  
“What are we?”  
He licked his lips nervously as he stared at the pavement under his shoes. It was wet from the rain earlier.  
  
“Members of the species Homo sapiens, distinguished from other apes by a larger brain and the capacity of speech?” The other boy suggested.  
“Jesus Christ, have I already told you how much of a nerd you are?”  
  
Even laughed. Isak grinned. A pause. Just their breaths. Then:  
“I’m serious, though.”  
“I know.”  
“What are we?” he repeated.  
And instead of an answer he got a question: “What do you want us to be?”  
  
He looked up and saw the stars as Even said his name once more: “Isak?” Not an accusation but a song.  
  
Another few seconds of silence, spread between two continents. 7000 kilometres away. He saw the great bear constellation and it reminded him of the moles on Evens cheek.  
“Do you think long distance relationships can go well?  
“People can make it work, if they really want to”, Even gave back.  
“And do you.. uh…”, he then started, still staring at the sky.  
“I want to make it work, yes”, he heard Even say, his voice so very clear.  
  
His heartbeat felt surprisingly steady in his chest as he nodded: “Me too.”  
“Yeah?” The smile was almost audible again.  
“Yeah.” He hoped that Even could hear it as well.  
  
  
  
After that night nothing really changed. They continued like they always did, they skyped and texted and it felt good and comfortable and at the same time it felt like a beginning, even though everything stayed the same.  
  
                               
  
**Even, 16:15:**  
I miss you   
  
**you, 16:16:**  
you already know my answer  
  
**Even, 16:16:**  
tell me again  
  
**you, 16:16:**  
i miss you, too  
very much to be exact  
  
**Even, 16:16:**  
are you free this evening? Skype?  
  
**you, 16:17:**  
are you asking me on a _date_ , Even Bech N _æ_ sheim?   
  
**Even, 16:17:**  
of course. Candlelight-dinner and all   
  
**you, 16:17:**  
  
  
**you, 16:17**  
ten?   
  
**Even, 16:17:**  
ten sounds perfect   
  
When he accepted the skype call almost six hours later he didn’t expect them to _really_ have a candlelight dinner. But there he was, Even in a dimmed room, wearing a **fucking** **suit** while the burning candle, that was placed on the same table as the laptop, flickered slightly. Slow classical music played in the background and Even raised his eyebrows, a playful smile on his lips.  
Isak felt ridiculous in his sweatpants and his old Rolling Stones shirt with the hole right under his left armpit. But in the end? In the end it didn’t matter.  
It also didn’t matter that the only food he had were four gummi bears in an almost empty bag.  
  
“Wow”, Isak said as he blinked at Even and Evens smile grew even wider.  
“I told you. Candlelight-dinner.” He sounded amused.  
“Yeah, well, you know that I’m absolutely terrible at taking hints.”  
“True.”  
“I’m underdressed now.”  
“You look amazing, Isak.” He didn’t blush at the words (- he definitely did).  
“Says the guy who’s wearing a suit”, he replied with a slight grin on his lips.  
At that, Even adjusted his tie, sitting upright.  
Isak shook his head and glanced at his hands for a few seconds, before he dared to look up again, licking his lips: “I like it.”  
Even smirked as he tilted his head. “Does it… _suit_ me?”  
He let out an annoyed groan as he threw his head back – but ended up laughing anyway: “Tell me again, why am I into you?”  
“Because I’m your incredibly smart and funny boyfriend?”  
“Geez.”  
  
They spent the entire night skyping, talking about school and the suit and Evens work at the café, about the most recent songs they had listened to and movies Isak just _had to watch_ or Even had no choice but breaking up with him (“I just can’t date someone who has never seen Moulin Rouge, Isak. It’s almost as bad as not knowing Pretty Woman!” – “I haven’t seen Pretty Woman either” – “Say, do you desperately want to kill me or why are you saying such inhuman things?!”).  
At almost half past eight in the morning, the sun already shining through his window, they eventually ended the call.  
  
And when Isak had finally put his laptop away, ready to close his eyes and drift off to sleep, his phone buzzed.  
He blinked his eyes open. Another buzz. And another. And another.  
  
He grabbed it, figuring that he wasn’t asleep yet, so it wouldn’t make a huge difference to check the texts real quick.  
  
**Even, 07:29:**  
I can’t stop thinking about you   
  
**Even, 07:29:**  
I really want to kiss you  
  
**Even, 07:29:**  
I wish I could  
  
He felt his mouth go dry and his heartbeat quicken in his chest. Ba Boom. Ba Boom. Ba Boom. Ba Boom.  
  
**Even, 07:29:**  
Your lips are so damn pretty, Isak **  
  
Even, 07:30:  
** You are absolutely beautiful  
  
**you, 07:30:**  
even  
  
**Even, 07:30:  
** you are  
  
**Even, 07:30:**  
god what would I give to be able to kiss you right now  
  
**Even, 07:30:**  
you know, I’m always a bit jealous when you talk about your friends at school  
because they’re able to be around you all the time  
I want that, too  
  
**Even, 07:31:**  
I wish I could touch you  
  
He didn’t even think about what to reply. His brain wouldn’t have a clear answer anyway. The fluttering feeling in his gut however? It made his fingers find the letters automatically, forming the responses within seconds.  
  
**you, 07:31:**  
fuck  
  
**you, 07:31:  
** me too  
  
**you, 07:32** :  
when i saw you wearing that damn suit earlier  
  
**Even, 07:32:**  
what about it?  
  
He closed his eyes for a short moment and took in the mental image of Even, held onto every detail he could remember. The colour of the tie (a dark red), the neatly ironed button-down, the coat that had hugged his body just right.  
  
**you, 07:32:**  
all i wanted for you to do was to take it off  
  
**Even, 07:33:**  
you could have asked me to  
  
Heat spread through his body, gathering in his lower stomach and he bit his lip as his fingers hovered over the screen.  
  
**you, 07:34**  
then i ask you to take it off now  
  
**Even, 07:34:**  
_faen_  
  
**Even, 07:35:**  
how about you join me?  
  
**Even, 07:35:**  
even though that shirt looked fucking great on you  
please take it off  
  
So he did. His breaths were uneven as he dragged his shirt over his head. It fell to the ground with a low rustle, followed by his dark sweatpants. And really, Isak was thankful for his roommates sleeping in on weekends.  
  
**you, 07:37:**  
tell me about what you thought of earlier  
  
**Even, 07:37:**  
you mean me kissing you?  
  
**Even, 07:37:**  
my hands finding your hips as my lips trail over your jaw to your neck?  
  
**Even, 07:38:**  
me leaving marks so everyone knows you are mine?  
  
He let his fingertips wander and felt himself growing harder and harder in his boxers every time a new text filled his phone screen.   
  
**you, 07:38:**  
fuck yes  
  
**Even, 07:39:**  
I would kiss every centimetre of your perfect skin  
making you squirm beneath my lips  
  
Isak couldn’t tear his eyes from his phone, only closed them every few seconds to let the images flood his mind. Even above him. His warmth, his smell, his everything.  
  
**Even, 07:39:**  
are you touching yourself for me, baby?  
  
He hadn’t even noticed his hand slipping under the fabric, he hadn’t noticed the firm movements of his fist around his cock, his thumb tracing over the sensitive tip, once, twice.  
  
A whimper escaped his lips while the pictures danced in front of his eyes. _Even, Even, Even._ His lips and his fingers. Just him.  
  
**you, 07:40:**  
yes  
  
**Even, 07:40:**  
fuck you’re amazing  
do you want to skype…?  
  
**you, 07:40:**  
give me a second  
  
With his laptop sitting on his lap he logged into skype, biting his lips and closing his eyes for another moment before pressing the call button eventually.  
And when he saw Even with slightly ruffled hair, a bare chest and a certain glint in his eyes, that he had never seen before, he couldn’t help but smile a little. Even mirrored it.  
  
“You know, we don’t have to do this, right?” he heard him asking and Isak nodded.  
“I know, trust me.”  
“I just don’t want you to feel like you have to do this, because we got here and… if it makes you uncomfortable we can stop, it’s just, fuck, you’re beautiful like this and I’ve been thinking about you for so long and-“  
“I’ve got this, Even. I want to do this.” He couldn’t believe how steady his own voice sounded, since the fluttering feeling in his stomach was almost overwhelming. In a good way.  
Even stared at him, nodded so slightly that it was easy to miss.  
“So…”, Isak started and Even moved out of the picture for a second, holding up headphones just a moment later.  
“We should probably-“  
“Yeah.”  
“Yeah.”  
They both nodded this time and Isak got up to get his headphones as well.  
  
When he sat back down he caught Even looking at him, the boy’s blue eyes trailing over his shoulders and his chest, back up to his face.  
  
“I can’t believe how beautiful you are”, he said and Isak blushed (and really, it was ridiculous that he had barely blushed earlier, when the texts had left so much room for imagination, but now that Even called him beautiful he was as red as a tomato).  
  
“I want to kiss you so bad”, he continued with a deeper, lower voice and Isak leaned back in his pillows, letting out a shaky breath.  
“And touch you. Your lips, your cheeks. Your jaw”, he continued and Isak’s fingers moved, touching his lips first, then travelling to his cheekbones and down his jaw.  
He felt Evens eyes on him, watching every single movement  
“If I were with you, I’d lean over you right now and I’d bite your lips, god.”  
“And then?” His own voice sounded distant, like he didn’t even say the words himself, like he listened to another person speaking.  
“Then I’d let my hands roam over your chest while kissing you, I’d trace the muscles, my fingertips on your sides afterwards and finally finding your hips. I’d rub circles in your skin, showing you how much I adore you. And then I’d let my lips follow that path. Worshipping your entire body.”  
Isak continued to let his fingers trail while he watched Even. His eyelids felt heavy, but he couldn’t look away either.  
“I’d trace the band of your boxers with my tongue, hooking my thumbs in the elastic. And when you would move your hips up against me…”  
Isak automatically moved his hips, he couldn’t help it, he just did. A low moan escaped him, only meeting air. God, how he wished Even was with him right now. “Even”, he said and his own voice sounded raspier.    
“I’d grind down first, creating enough friction to make you whimper, before I’d eventually pull the fabric aside to wrap my fingers around you. Of course, I would still look at you, how could I not? I’d keep my eyes on you, while you part your lips. Maybe you’d sink your fingers in my hair. Moan my name.”  
He saw how Evens own hand disappeared, how he opened his mouth just slightly.  
  
He couldn’t help it. Without a second thought he shoved his boxers down his hips, firmly grasping the shaft and letting his fingertips caress the head every once in a while. He sighed: “Fuck, Even, I wish you were here.”  
They watched how their chests heaved and fell, how they moved together, a rhythm on their own.  
“Baby, you have no idea how much I want to be with you right now. Touch you. Maybe even suck you off if you’d let me.”  
  
It didn’t take much more. He bit his lips from keeping the moans getting too loud.  
  
“Show me, baby”, he heard Even say and they both moved their laptops to reveal their hands wrapped around their cocks tightly.  
And without thinking about it twice he let out a soft “fuck” as he watched his boyfriend, moving his fingers, stroking himself with lidded eyes.  
“You’re so fucking beautiful, I’d make you feel so good”, Even almost sighed and Isak bucked his hips at his words.  
  
“I can’t-“, he started, moving his hands up and down franticly, increasing the pressure. Even mimicked him and that was it.  
With Evens name on his lips he came – he remembered the shower as his release hit his stomach and chest, covered part of his hand.  
  
He held his eyes closed, enjoying the buzzing feeling in his body and his mind, enjoying the sleepiness that started to spread in his limbs and he only blinked again when Even moaned his name over and over and over.  
“Fuck Isak, fuck. Isak. _Isak_.”  
  
He just watched.  
  
It was incredibly intimate, seeing how Evens face relaxed seconds after the orgasm, how he still stroked his cock lazily.  
When Even opened his eyes he grinned a little. And Isak? Isak smiled an almost shy smile.  
  
“Are you fucking kidding me? You’re blushing _now_? After you made me cum? Fuck, I’m so in love with you”, Even laughed, shaking his head in disbelief.  
He started sitting up slightly, moving to get tissues out of bed stand to clean the mess up. And when he looked up at Even he shrugged, the same smile still on his lips. “Well, stuff like this doesn’t happen every day. Getting off with your boyfriend over skype isn’t a point on my usual to-do list.”  
  
Even propped himself up on his elbows. “I sure hope that it will be from now on.”  
  
He couldn’t help but smirk as well.  
“I think that’s possible.”  
  
“Yes?” Even asked and his eyes crinkled as he smiled. All teeth and laughter lines.  
“Yes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please bare with me, this is my first time writing explicit smut, so if it sucks, I'm sorry. I tried?
> 
> Also: I can't believe there is one more chapter to go? I kind of fell in love with this story, so I really don't want it to be over that soon, but that's just how it goes, I guess. I have a part two planned, but I'm not entirely sure if I'll write it in the end, since I don't have too much of a plot going on right now. Soooooo, I'll decide on that.
> 
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated, thank you guys so much for your support, it means the world to me <3
> 
> In case you want to say hi, you can find me on [tumblr](http://www.aceteroid.tumblr.com)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: This chapter contains a panic attack and a manic episode, as well as mentions of depression.

When Isak woke up on Sunday, the late afternoon sun was shining through the window into his room.  
  
And really, he was surprised that Eskild hadn’t woken him up yet, because normally that’s a thing the older boy just _loved_ to do.  
Turning up Beyoncé’s “hottest hits”. Opening the door to his room and singing _Sweet Dream_ (which was ironic, really). A bit too loud and a bit too enthusiastic. Eventually trying to snatch the blanket away with a grin on his lips. Putting his cold hands on Isak’s feet, which always resulted in Isak jumping - and in the end: glaring at him.   
  
Today, however, he was left alone.  
The flat was silent, no Eskild making him get up, no Linn fidgeting in the kitchen, no Noora using the blow-dryer.   
Just him and his bed and the sheltering warmth of the sun and… his buzzing phone.  
  
He smiled at the possibility of Even sending him texts, maybe calling him _sleeping beauty_ again or just sharing random song lyrics with him, like the many other times.  
_(Why are you so far from me?  
In my arms is where you ought to be.  
  
How long will you make me wait?  
  
I don't know how much more I can take.  
  
I missed you  
But I haven't met you  
  
Oh but I want to  
  
How I do)  
  
_ For a moment he just stayed like this, looking up at the ceiling of his bedroom, tracing the little imaginary shapes in the ingrain wallpaper with his eyes. He saw waves and leaves and stars and raindrops.  
  
Isak wasn’t sure when he had felt that much at peace the last time. Years ago, probably.  
Maybe that would change from now on with Even by his side (even if it was only figuratively) and the glow in his chest whenever he thought of him and his smile and his voice and his… his everything. The habits and quirks.  
All the little things that made him Even.  
  
He bit his lip as a small smile started spreading on his face. It was a bit silly, yes, but he was happy, he was content. And that hadn’t happened in a long time. So he welcomed the delight flooding through his body.  
  
When his phone didn’t stop buzzing he unplugged it from its charger – and as soon as the light from the screen illuminated his face he saw the amount of messages that popped up one after another.  
  
A text from Even, sent shortly after he fell asleep.  
  
**Even, 08:03:  
** I wish that you were here with me   
I miss you  
  
He wanted get lost in the feeling, in the intimacy he had never quite felt before, but when he saw the other notifications he sat up, frowning slightly.  
  
Jonas had called him six times and there were nine unread messages. He was only able to see the latest one.  
_  
_**Jonas, 17:39: _  
_** JUST FUCKING LOOK AT YOUR PHONE ISAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
_  
_ And before he could even open up the conversation, Jonas called him again.  
He stared at the blinking name on his screen. The ringtone filled the room.  
  
_What the hell?_  That usually wasn’t a thing. Jonas didn’t like phone calls too much, he had made that clear when Isak had gotten his first phone in sixth grade.  
_(“I’ll just call you later and…”  
“Just text me”  
“Why? It would take ages to type it all down.”  
“There are way too many possibilities to understand things wrong if you can’t look at the person you’re talking to.”  
“But-“  
“Trust me, been there, done that. Just text.”)  
_ Therefore he had every right to be confused. _  
_  
“Uh.. hi? Jonas?”  
“Isak! Finally.” Jonas didn’t really sound like himself, more tense than usual. There was definitely something up.  
“What is it?” he wanted to ask, but his best friend was faster.  
“Did you read the messages?” Jonas didn’t wait for him to reply. Instead he continued right away:  
“Fuck, Even is missing. Has he texted you or anything?”  
  
Isak blinked in surprise, his gaze moving around the room frantically, almost as he was looking for an answer to what the _fuck_ it all meant.  
_Even is missing._ He repeated those three words over and over in his head but it didn’t make any sense. Why would he be missing?  
He looked at the sheets of his bed, he looked out of the window, he looked at the floor and at the laptop sitting next to his night stand. His eyes only lingered for a few seconds before moving on. None of it helped, no answer, nope. So he asked:  
“What do you mean _he is **missing**_?”  
  
Normally, Jonas would have joked about the stupidity of the question. Now however, his voice was serious.  
Isak still didn’t really understand _anything_.  
  
“We have no clue where he is.” A small pause, just one or two seconds, then his best friend asked again: “Listen, Isak, we need to know, has he texted you?”  
  
It felt like everyone wanted to pull a prank on him.  
Because Even was _fine_.  
They had talked only a few hours ago. And he had seemed good, happy even, with the huge smile on his face and the sparkle in his eyes.  
“no, I…”, he started, shaking his head. “I don’t really understand this, Jonas. What’s going on? What’s the problem here? We skyped this morning and everything had been alright. Why would he just… disappear? That doesn’t make any sense.”  
“I have no idea, Isak. But he’s gone. That’s a fact.” His voice still sounded different.  
“How long has he been missing? Could be that he’s just… I don’t know, walking around town or something? I mean, he’s twenty. He knows what he’s doing.”  
  
Jonas didn’t answer right away. There were voices in the background. Maybe Alex. Maybe Evens mother. He couldn’t tell. But they sounded upset. And Isak furred his brows further, getting out of bed to walk around the room.  
Because how was he supposed to just sit there, waiting patiently, when nobody told him what the hell was happening? It didn’t make sense. None of it.  
  
“Look, man, there are things going on right now. And we don’t know if Even is just _walking around town_ or if something serious happened. He went to work this morning but didn’t come home after his shift. So Evens mom called him. He didn’t react.”  
Isak felt some kind of trembling settle in his chest as Jonas continued to speak:  
“Normally, he always answers his phone, it’s a deal he has with his mom after some incident happened a few year ago or so.”  
“Incident?” he asked and stared at the floor.  
“I have no idea, really, but that’s not the point. She called at the café two hours after he should have been home. They said he had called in sick. And sure, he could just chill at some friend's house or whatever, but that’s just not the way he is. He’d leave a message. But he didn’t. For all we know he could be in danger. So, please, just… Has he texted you?”  
  
Isak froze, trying to process all the things his best friend had just said, as an unpleasant feeling in his gut started fighting its way towards his chest.  
_He isn’t answering his phone, he’d leave a message, he could be in danger.  
  
_ The thoughts started spinning in his head, piling up and he knew it was just a matter of time until they came crashing down. _  
_ It was similar to the way he had been feeling at home, when things had started to go downhill.  
He remembered the time his mother had smashed her favourite plates, the ones that had Christ's face on them, plates she had kept neatly in a glass cabinet in the living room. She had thrown them all on the floor after a particularly bad fight with his father, muttering “I don’t deserve this, I don’t deserve him watching over me. I am a sinner. Lord, please forgive me.”  
  
He closed his eyes and a heaviness settled in his limbs. His fingers felt tingling and numb at the same time.  
  
_He isn’t answering his phone, he’d leave a message, he could be in danger._  
  
As much as he wanted to believe everything was alright, as much as he wanted to hold onto the idea that they were all just overreacting, he couldn’t help but feel the panic rising.  
  
Because right now? Even was _lost_.  
Nobody knew where he was.  
And Isak couldn’t do anything about it.  
He was fucking _7000 kilometres away_ while his boyfriend was nowhere to be found.  
  
“Isak? You still there?” Jonas asked.  
  
His palms started to feel sweaty and he had to keep not just his hands, but also his voice from trembling.  
The words felt like a mess in his mouth and it took him a few seconds to organize them into real sentences that (at least sort of) made sense.  
  
“Yeah, I am… uh… I… I mean, as I said, we skyped this morning and he just sent one text afterwards. At 8. That’s it.”  
“Okay, try calling or texting him or… whatever, really, maybe he’ll respond because it’s you.”  
He nodded automatically, even though he was aware nobody could see him.  
“Yes, sure, I’ll do that. Please tell me if you know something new.”  
  
His voice sounded calm, almost put together, even though he felt so dizzy that he could barely notice anything else.  
  
“I promise I’ll do that. But I gotta go. I’ll call you later.”  
And with that he was left with an empty line. Nothing but silence.  
However, his head was loud enough.  
  
What had happened? Where was he? Had it something to do with what they did?  
_Maybe he wants to distance himself from you_ , the little voice in his head said and he squeezed his eyes shut, only for a short moment.  
  
Isak breathed, at least tried to, but his throat felt incredibly dry, so tight that, for a moment, he thought he was being choked. He sucked in air but it didn’t seem to reach his lungs.  
  
Panic started to devour his mind as he scrolled through his contacts, stopped when he found Evens name.  
For a moment, he just watched.  
And then he pressed the green button.  
  
He still stood in the middle of this room, but now it almost felt like something was pulling the ground from beneath him.  
The silence in the line was deafening, only interrupted by the tearing dial tone.  
  
_Please pick up. Please pick up. Please pick up. Please pick up._  
He counted the seconds, but it felt like hours in which nothing happened.  
   
_The person you’ve called is temporarily not available.  
  
_ For some reason it felt like watching the high tide, spending a rainy day at the ocean to look at the water coming back after hours, drowning everything. His entire mind.  
It felt like watching a brick wall collapse, piece by piece, dust blowing up and blurring his vision until there were only ruins left. Splinted stones. Fragments of thoughts.  
It was crushing and it was vast and it was towering in a way he couldn’t put into words. It took up every cell in his entire body.  
  
He ended the call and sank down onto the floor, his eyes still closed.  
_Even was lost._  
What the fuck was going on?  
What had happened? Had Even left voluntarily?  
Everything had seemed fine hours ago - and now he was just _gone_?  
It didn’t make sense.  
Something must have happened. Maybe there had been an accident. Maybe he was hurt. Or maybe someone had kidnapped him and kept him locked inside some basement without any windows.  
Maybe this. Maybe that. Too many options.  
  
His breathing became erratic as his thoughts continued picturing scenario after scenario.  
  
There were sounds outside his room, but it felt too far away to actually focus on it.  
  
He opened his eyes and tiny dots were dancing in his vision.  
Then he pressed the call button again. Dial tone, nothing else.  
  
With unsteady fingers he eventually typed a text. It took him longer than usual.  
  
**you, 17:46:**  
baby where are you??  
i’m worried  
please call me as soon as you read this  
  
The messages felt hollow, like he didn’t expect Even to ever answer.  
  
“Isak, I bought strawberries, do you want some?”, he heard Eskild call from the kitchen, but he felt like he couldn’t respond, so he just clenched his phone in his fist as he waited for another _bing_ of a message or the tone of an incoming call.  
  
“Isak?” Eskild repeated and this time his voice felt closer (but still miles away; he wasn’t quite sure how it was possible).  
  
A knock on his door, followed by a muttered “I swear, if you’re still asleep”.  
He stared at the phone in his hands, his knuckles white. His fingers hurt from not letting go, but he didn’t care. He had to do something. Anything. And if it was just clenching his phone, waiting, waiting, waiting, then it had to do.  
  
When Eskild peeked into the nearly dark room (“Isak?” he asked), he didn’t move.  
Clouds covered the sun.  
  
He also didn’t move when Eskild kneeled next to him, carefully placing a hand on his shoulder. “Isak, hey, are you okay?”  
He didn’t move when the boy pulled him closer.  
“Isak? Isak, listen to me. Just listen to my voice now.”  
Everything seemed near and distant, quiet and loud. It felt like the walls were closing in on him. Like he was trapped in a burning building with no way to get out.  
  
He still stared at his phone as he felt Eskilds hand moving from his shoulder to his chest.  
“Breathe with me, Isak. Focus on me. In and out. Long and steady breaths.”  
  
He tried to. He really tried.  
  
  
  
Isak didn’t know how much time had passed. He didn’t know how Eskild had managed to calm him down.  
But the world had continued to move, slow and steady (even if it had felt like everything had just _stopped_ for a moment) and now he was lying on his bed, staring at the window while Eskild was making him tea.  
  
He wanted to check his phone, but it was still lying on the floor.  
And he didn’t trust his legs to get up.  
So he stayed where he was, looking at the window with the sun nowhere to be seen. Metaphoric, really.  
  
He heard a knock and turned his head, expecting Eskild in the doorframe, the cup of tea in his hand. But he wasn’t there.  
So he sat up. He heard footsteps in the hallway. Muffled voices.  
His gaze shifted towards the clock on his nightstand, checking the time and knew that Noora would appear in a minute or so, asking him if he was alright. Because that was just the way Noora was. Gentle and caring and delicate and nice. And really, he couldn’t be more thankful for the people he lived with.  
  
With the blanket close around him he waited for the time to pass, waited for Eskild or Noora or both of them to show up, waited for his phone to do _something_. Because with him here in Oslo there wasn’t that much he could actually accomplish. Only waiting.  
  
Eventually Eskild appeared in his room. His facial expression illegible.  
“I’ll be in the kitchen if you need me. Just… let me know, yeah?” His voice was soft, as he looked at Isak and Isak nodded in response, not quite sure what he should make out of it.  
  
Eskild left.  
  
And then Even entered, wearing a small, slightly crooked smile on his face as their eyes met.  
“Halla”, he said. Almost casually. As if it was a thing he did every day. A completely common situation. 100% ordinary. Nothing special.  
As if he wasn’t supposed to be in fucking Seattle. 7000 kilometres away.  
  
Isak thought a part of him died as he looked. Maybe he was still dreaming. Maybe this was all fake. Hidden cameras and all. It was the only solution that made sense.  
But when he blinked, staring at Even, nothing changed. The boy just continued to look at him.  
  
He knew he should call Jonas right now, without any hesitation, but when he got up he couldn’t help but hug Even tight.  
He couldn’t help to bury his fingers in the cloth of his hoodie, breathing in and holding onto the light scent of mint and rain and _Even_.  
Because he was here and he was okay, he was safe.  
  
Even placed his cool hands on Isaks back and it felt like they had done that a million times already.  
Because the fitted together like puzzle pieces. No fumbling, no awkward _where do I put my hands_. Just them.  
  
“What the fuck”, was the first thing Isak managed to say after seconds of just holding each other close. He murmured the words into Evens neck, feeling the warm of his skin distinctly.  
  
“What a nice way to greet your boyfriend.” He could hear the teasing tone in Evens voice and it took all of his volition to step away from him.  
  
“I mean it, Even. What the fuck?” He didn’t understand shit.  
  
He saw how he licked his lips, taking Isak’s hands in his.  
“I had to meet you. I just couldn’t stay in Seattle knowing you’re all the way here in Oslo. I couldn’t just… know that you’re here and I’m there when all I want is to be with you. We belong together.”  
  
He opened his mouth so say something, anything, but the words failed him.  
Even didn’t seem to mind. Because he continued, voice sounding almost excited:  
  
“We do. It’s like our own version of _Romeo and Juliet_. Less tragedy, of course, but still. The most impressive love story to ever exist. Us, making it work, even though the world is trying to part us, just like their families tried to keep them away from each other. But nothing stopped them, they found their way, because they loved each other. And that’s why we will manage too. Even with 7323 kilometres between us.”  
  
He saw Evens lips stretch into an even bigger smile. It didn’t feel quite right.  
  
“Romeo and Juliet die in the end-“, Isak started, but Even didn’t seem to listen. Instead he went on.  
  
“Or you know, we’re like… like John and Savannah, where the moon is never bigger than your thumb. And we’ll write each other letters. No wars, though. Because I would never leave you, now I am here. How could I ever leave your side? It would tear me apart to see you fall in love with someone else.”  
  
There was a small pause where Even just stared at him without saying a word. Then: “Please don’t fall in love with someone else. Please, Isak. I _need_ you.”  
  
Evens glimpse became glazed as he talked and the corners of his lips fell slowly.  
  
“Even, what is going on…?” he asked and his voice was careful. He didn’t let go of the boys hands.  
“You don’t seem happy to have me here. Should I go?”  
“What? No, I… I am happy-“  
“Me too!” The smile was back, just as bright as before. Isak felt like he was missing something. Important information he needed to understand all of it. Because this? This was off.  
“I just… I didn’t expect you to show up here. Especially without you telling anyone. Your family is sick with worry.”  
  
And with that Even took a step back, running a hand through his hair. The smile faltered again.  
“They…”, he started, letting the word hang in the air between the two of them.  
  
“I’ll call Jonas and let them know that you’re here, okay?”  
  
Even stared into the distance, staring right through him with his brows furrowed slightly. “No”, he muttered under his breath. “No, no, no, _no_.”  
“What is it?” His voice was quieter now as he stepped closer to Even.  
“I scared them. I did it again. I didn’t mean to, Isak. You have to believe me. I didn’t mean to.” He sounded restless, panicked even and Isak could hear his breath hitching.  
Without thinking about it twice he was cupping his face in his hands. “Breathe”, he said, just as Eskild had instructed him to do earlier.    
He saw something in Evens eyes he couldn’t quite place. So he let his thumbs ghost over his cheeks. “Just breathe, okay? I need you to calm down and talk to me.”  
He had never done anything like this before and he didn’t know if it was any help, but he couldn’t just… _watch_. So he tried.  
  
“But I did, didn’t I? I scared them. My family. And you.”  
“It’s okay, Even. You didn’t mean to. We can just call them and-”  
“No, you… You don’t understand, I… I did that way too often already. I scare people. I fuck up.”  
  
With that he took a few steps away from Isak, grabbing the backpack he had placed on the floor earlier.  
  
“What are you doing?”  
“I need to go home”, Even explained, his tone upset. “I shouldn’t have done this. I… They will hate me. You will hate me. I need to go. I need to make things right.”  
“Even, I don’t understand, what is going on?!” A hint of frustration echoed in his words, mixed with mostly confusion.  
  
And for a second they just looked at each other, the room silent, until Even barely whispered: “I’m messed up. That’s why we moved to Seattle in the first place. Because I lost it and of course, it was just a question of time until-“  
The sentence stayed unfinished, filling up the air.  
Isak saw something in his gaze shifting. So he said his name while taking hold of his hands again, linking their fingers together.  
His voice was softer now, low and gentle, it was patient, because he truly _wanted_ to make sense out of all this, no matter how long it would take.   
  
“I’m sick, Isak.”  
  
He didn’t respond right away. And out of all sudden Even looked so very small, with his shoulders slightly pulled together and his head bowed.  
  
“Sick? In what way?” The question seemed to weight tons, the words heavy, since Even didn’t look up.  
“Even”, Isak tried again, carefully stroking the boys hands with his fingertips.  
  
He glanced at him eventually, just for a moment, breathing out shakily before he said:  
“I’m bipolar.”  
  
Isak opened his mouth, not knowing how to reply during the first few seconds. Because what was he supposed to say? Was there a google article on _how to react when your boyfriend tells you he is bipolar_ with an attached bonus link _and what exactly does that even mean_?  
  
Moments passed and he could see how Even became more and more insecure, the silence so thick he could have cut it with a knife, so in the end he said: “Okay. And… What exactly does that mean? I… I’m just… I don’t really know much about it. It’s a mental illness, right?”  
Even hesitated, but then: “It means that I can either be like… really fucking happy, so happy that everything seems like the _best_ idea, like… I’m full of energy. Or I can be so sad that I feel like I can’t move at all. Everything seems exhausting then. Even just lying in bed. That’s the simplest explanation, I guess.”  
“And flying here was such an… idea?” He still held onto his hands as Even nodded a second time.  
“Yes. I am… _was_ … manic.”  
“Okay.”  
“Okay?”  
“Yeah. Okay. And after that uhm… _episode_ of you being manic?”  
“Manic episodes are mostly followed by depression.”  
Isak nodded again, pointing at his bed a second later as he picked up his phone from the floor. “You can sit or lie down if you want.”  
  
And Even? He just blinked at him. Like he couldn’t quite believe this was happening.  
“I should go”, he said one more time, barely audible, his backpack still sitting on his left shoulder.  
“There is no way I will let you fly home now.”  
Even sounded almost tired as he gave back a short “It’s not your job to take care of me, Isak.” As if he had had that argument way too often already.  
“No, that’s not what I meant.” He shook his head, looking at him, before going on: “You flew all the way from Seattle. There is no way I will let you go after what... ten minutes?” Again: Even blinked.  
And then he eventually sat down on the bed as Isak left the room to call Jonas.  
  
                               
  
“I will send the prescription in a second, so you can get the meds as soon as possible”, Evens mother explained and before he could answer, she spoke again.  
“Oh and Isak?” Her voice became softer.  
“It’s important that you remember that none of this is your fault, yes? It’s just the way Even is and something like this can happen at times. All you can do now is be there and wait until he’s ready. That might not happen today or tomorrow, but it will get better.”  
  
For a second or two none of them said anything.  
  
“Somebody once said that it may look stormy now, but it never rains forever. Just take it one step at a time, if it feels like it’s too much.”  
  
“Thank you, Mrs. Bech Næsheim.”  
  
“No need to thank me, dear. It will be alright. However, if anything is up or you’re not sure, you have my number, so just let me know.”  
“Of course.”  
  
                               
  
The beginning was tough.  
  
Because yes, Evens mom had talked him through the basics, the most important things such as reminding Even to take the pills (Isak had made Eskild get them the same evening) or placing a plate of food (even if it was just as simple as cardamom-toasties) on the night stand to make him eat something.  
  
But in the end? In the end there was more to it than just handing him meds and sandwiches.  
  
In the end it was him trying to figure out what to do and what to say when lying next to Even who wouldn’t speak for hours and eventually realizing:  
It didn’t take much more than just keeping him company, than being there for him, than pulling the blankets over his body when they slipped off during sleep. It didn’t take much more than telling him stories about school and sitting on the floor next to him, doing his assignments, just to look up at him every now and them, giving him a small smile.  
  
It was all Even needed.  
  
And Isak? He needed Even.  
  
                               
  
When he came home from school Wednesday afternoon he was greeted by Even standing in the kitchen, whistling to a song that was quietly playing on the radio.  
For a moment he stayed in the door frame, leaning against the wood as he watched him cracking eggs and bobbing his head to the music.  
  
“Hei”, he said eventually and Even looked over his shoulder.  
  
He still looked tired with the bags under his grey blue eyes (they reminded him of the sky, the clouds and the wind). But there was a slight smile playing on his lips.  
  
“Halla”, he greeted back and lowered the heat of the stove, just to turn to Isak a seond later.  
  
“How are you feeling?”  
Even shrugged. “I’m… better. Not perfect. But definitely better.”  
“Yeah?” he asked and Even nodded in response: “Yeah.”  
“That’s good.”  
  
A tiny smile spread on his face and Even cocked his head, taking a step towards him and brushing his hair out of his face. A small gesture. Still: It meant the world.  
“It’s good to see you smile”, he heard him say (and the corners of his mouth turned even more upwards at that).  
“I could say the same thing.”  
  
Evens placed his left hand on his hips, drawing small circles in the fabric of his old Rolling Stones shirt (the one with the hole right beneath the armpit). “I still like this one on you.”  
  
A soft laugh escaped his lips as he leaned in, placing his head on Evens shoulder.  
  
“You’re missing your suit, though.”  
“True. However, I’m making Omelettes. And that’s even better than me wearing a tux.”  
“The expectations are high, then.”  
“If I come up to them, what do I get?” Even asked which made Isak raise his eyebrows.  
“You want a reward now?”  
“Hmm.”  
  
He drew back to look at him with a grin on his lips and Even mirrored it. For the first time in two weeks he actually seemed to enjoy the moment. And that made the entire situation even better.  
  
“I think I can think of something”, Isak nearly purred, his voice low, almost closing the distance in between them and when Even leaned in closer, so close that he could feel his breath on his lips - he let go of him, sitting down at the kitchen table a second later.  
  
“But: Omelettes first. After all this is supposed to be a deal.”  
  
A groan escaped Evens lips, but in the end he laughed quietly, returning to the pan:  
“Yes, sir.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all: sorry for making you wait this long for the last chapter. It was quite hard for me to write because  
> a) it was just hard. I struggled a lot with the (hopefully) accurate portrayal.  
> b) school totally exhausted me! plus: only two more weeks to go until I have to write my finals (and I still have like 60 more pages to memorize, so.. hah, fun.)
> 
> So really, I hope that the lenght of the chapter makes it up? If not I've got some other information:  
> There will be one more chapter.  
> However it's not a _real_ chapter ten but more of a little.. extra to just round it off.  
>  I will try to write it as soon as I can (but could be that I'll only publish it after the exams).
> 
> So, this is it. That's the story. I hope I didn't disappoint.  
> Thank you all for reading this.  
> Please, do let me know what you think!! <3


	10. Epilogue

“Okay, so let’s talk through the plan one more time”, Magnus demanded, sitting on the couch with his elbows propped up on his knees. His eyebrows were knitted together in concentration as he looked at his friends, from Mahdi to Isak to Even and back.  
  
A sigh escaped Isak’s lips and he rolled his eyes. He had already explained it twice and really, it wasn’t too complicated.  
“Be nice”, Even whispered into his ear from where he was standing behind his boyfriend, his hands carefully placed on his sides and Isak could almost hear his smile.  
So eventually he relaxed a bit against the taller boy’s chest, taking one deep breath.    
  
“Mahdi and you pick him up from the airport and bring him here at around six. The others should arrive half an hour earlier. We surprise him. That’s it. That’s the plan”, Isak explained and Magnus nodded slowly.  
  
“Okay. Got it. Can Even come with us?” he then asked and Isak could hear Even laugh behind him, his chest moving against his back.  
“Sorry, Mags, I think Isak needs all the help he can get here”, Even answered, leaning onto Isak and Isak? He enjoyed it, melting into the little gesture, just because he finally could.  
  
“Oh come on, that’s just a lazy excuse for you to make out in the kitchen again only this time you actually should be blowing up balloons. I know you guys.”  
  
Isak let out a small huff, followed by a low “Fuck off.”  
“Be nice”, Even repeated once again in his quiet (but nevertheless amused) voice, placing a small kiss below his ear.  
“And actually you’re not that wrong”, he added as he looked into his friends’ direction.  
  
“Ugh, too much information”, Mahdi threw in with a theatrical shudder and Even shrugged a little, the smile still on his lips.  
“ _That_ is too much information for you? Really? I haven’t even started yet on what other things I could blow instead of the balloons and I am quite sure that…” Even was interrupted with an elbow hitting his stomach playfully.  
“Shut up”, Isak said (and everyone could hear how warm his voice sounded).  
  
  
  
Magnus and Mahdi left short after five o’clock and Isak plopped down on the couch with an exhausted sigh as soon as everything was finished.  
  
They had decorated the flat with all the things that reminded them of Jonas.  
Inflatable guitars, pillowcases with weed patterns, plastic cups with skateboards on them and curly straws (Magnus: “Get it? Because his hair is curly!!!”).  
Isak’s phone was connected with the speakers of the television, ready to play about 200 of Jonas’ favourite songs.  
They had even hung up some “Welcome back!”-garlands and there were numerous pictures of them all taped to one of the walls in the living room.  
Pictures of Jonas’ first broken leg due to _the skating-incident_.  
Pictures of Mahdis last birthday party, where the boys (and especially Jonas) had been totally wasted.  
Pictures of Isak and Jonas when they were five years old, trading Yu-Gi-Oh!-cards.  
Pictures of the group posing for Instagram, crossed arms in front of their chests.  
Pictures of Jonas and Eva brushing their teeth together.  
Pictures of Jonas trying to teach Vilde how to play her favourite song on his guitar.  
It was colourful and it was a bit chaotic, but it was them.  
  
“I never thought that surprise-parties would take up so much time. Isn’t it supposed to be more like… everything is dark when the person comes in, then somebody turns on the light and everyone yells surprise, the end?” He asked, while looking at Even who sat down next to him with a small grin on his lips.  
“Yeah, well, that would work for the surprise part, but a party? It kind of needs a few preparations. Music. Food. Beverages. A lot of other stuff, really”, he replied as Isak placed his head on his shoulder.  
  
“Hm. I’m not the one to throw parties”, he eventually murmured and Even laughed quietly.  
“More the guy who crashes them, then?”  
“You bet.”  
  
He saw how Even grabbed his hand and linked their fingers together, giving it a little squeeze.  
“Jonas will love this”, he heard him say and Isak smiled a little, regarding how Even’s thumb brushed over his skin.  
“You think so?” he asked and he felt Even nod slightly.  
“I am sure. You can see how much you guys missed him. And how much he means to you. He will appreciate it”, Even assured and Isak drew back, just to look at him.  
“You know what I appreciate?”  
Even gave back a little “hm?”, barely audible, but still there in the air between the two boys.  
  
“You saying this. Helping me. Being here. You.” For a moment he didn’t do anything but watch Even before he slowly dropped his gaze and started playing with their fingers.  
“I mean”, he then continued “it’s not perfect. Of course, it isn’t. But I’m still glad that it’s happening. And I’m glad it’s you.”  
  
He felt Evens eyes linger on him and for a few seconds there was only silence. Until Even sucked in his breath, his tone then playfully: “Is this some sort of love confession?”  
Automatically, he rolled his eyes: “I’m just saying…”  
“Nope. You definitely initiated a romantic moment. This will go down in history. The day Isak Valtersen actually put his feelings into deep, meaningful words. Being almost as extra as I am. Wow.”  
Even laughed and Isak couldn’t help but grin (he would never admit it) as he shoved him.  
  
Eventually Even brought their joined hands to his lips, kissing every single of Isak’s knuckles while looking at him with a honest expression: “I am glad, too.”  
  
They smiled at each other, the corners of their lips tilted upwards a slight bit and when Even leaned in, his heart still felt like it would jump out of his chest. As if it was their very first kiss.  
(It wasn’t; there had been Omelette-kisses, lazy kisses in bed, in the kitchen, in the living room, goodbye kisses when Isak left for school and “sorry I broke your phone-charger”-kisses).  
  
Their lips where just millimetres apart when the doorbell rang.  
  
“Fuck, that must be the girls.”  
  
  
  
Everyone was completely silent when they heard the rustling of the keys, they had given Magnus and Mahdi earlier (“Why the heck would we have the keys to your flat, dude?”, Magnus had asked and for a second they had all been quiet, searching for a legitimate reason. “Maybe… just tell Jonas that Isak and I are cooking for you, so we might not hear the doorbell or something? Be creative”), the front door ready to be opened.  
  
“And you’re really sure that it’s a good idea to let Isak make dinner? Don’t you think we’ll end up with food poisoning or something?” Jonas voice was clear and he could hear them laugh, as well as the light giggling of Eva next to him in the darkness.  
“Even’s helping him. That way we should be fine. Dude said that his cooking skills are on point so we trusted them not to blow up the kitchen this time”, Mahdi replied and this time it was Evens quiet laugh that filled his ears.  
Isak sushed the two of them.  
“I sure do hope so. I don’t want to die the first night back in Oslo”, Jonas joked and then the door opened.  
The light that fell into the hallway was blinding and Isak squinted his eyes.  
“What the fuck is…”, he heard his best friend start, but the sentence was interrupted by the light being turned on and the deafening cheer of everyone around him. **_“WELCOME HOME!!!!”_**  
They didn’t manage to shout the words in union. It was a bit sloppy. When he started speaking some others were already done.  
But it didn’t matter.  
Because Jonas blinked in surprise and started smiling his huge, toothy smile.  
Seeing it again after three months? It reminded him of how much he had missed his best friend. The crappy webcam quality was just not the same. And hearing him laugh right in front of him was not comparable to the metallic sound that had reached him through his headphones.  
  
Isak was the first to hug him tight. And when the others joined in he didn’t mind. It was a mess of bodies, of arms holding each other close, but it felt good and familiar, so he grinned happily.  
  
“Drittsekk, my cooking is the best. I’m the master chef. Culinary expert”, he exclaimed, looking at Jonas who raised his eyebrows at him.  
“Yeah, it’s soothing to hear that you’re still trying to convince yourself that you’re good at things you actually suck at, man. You haven’t changed a bit in three months.”  
  
They shared a smirk and Jonas patted his shoulder (at least he tried to in the massive hug they were still wrapped up in).  
  
  
  
The music was too loud and the songs were kind of trashy (were those really Jonas’ favourite songs?), but Isak smiled at his friends dancing and jumping around the room nevertheless.  
__  
_But I keep cruising_  
Can't stop, won't stop moving  
It's like I got this music  
In my mind  
Saying, "It's gonna be alright."  
  
They were singing, mouthing the words and for some reason it seemed like the moment was meant to be.  
  
Vilde, Noora and Sana holding each other’s hands, spinning around in circles.  
Magnus and Eskild lip-syncing the song with Eskild’s beloved hairbrush.  
Jonas, Linn and Mahdi bobbing their heads to the rhythm, while talking (more like screaming to hear each other over the music), pointing out especially embarrassing pictures hung up on the wall.  
Eva, Chris and Even pulling off the perfect performance, all belting out the lyrics, moving constantly and bouncing on the couch-cushions.  
  
He was leaning against the doorframe, a beer in hand as he watched all those people who mattered the most to him. And for once he felt at peace.  
  
  
  
“Hello there”, Even said with a big smile, placing his forearms on the wall behind Isak, right next to his head, before he leaned in to kiss his cheek.  
He couldn’t help but to smile back at him: “Hei. Enjoying yourself?”  
“Definitely. It would be even better if you’d dance with me, though”, Even gave back.  
Automatically his eyebrows shot up: “You’re trying this again?”  
“Hmm, why not? I’d just really like to dance with my incredibly handsome boyfriend before I have to get back to Seattle.”  
“That guy sounds good. Care to introduce me sometime?” Isak asked, the smile replaced by a tiny smirk.  
“Nah, sorry, he’s mine.” Evens grin was dazzling and Isak was so _so_ **_so_** very in love with him.  
“But didn’t you say you’d leave soon anyway?”  
“Yeah, but you know, the thing with my boyfriend is… we’re so gone for each other, so completely lost that we’ll even manage to go long distance until I move here for university next year.”  
  
He blinked up at Even as soon as he had processed the words. University. _Next year_. That definitely was a new information. “Wait, you’re serious?”  
“I’ll tell you when you dance with me”, Even repeated, the smirk back on his lips and just a second later, Isak wrapped his long arms around his boyfriend’s neck.  
“You’re going to uni in Oslo?!”  
“I’ve been talking to my mom for a while now, actually even before I came here and she said… as long as I take my meds and check in every other day… It should be fine. So… yeah. I’m going to uni in Oslo. If they take me, that is”, he explained and Isak shook his head in disbelief.  
“Oh my god. You’re kidding me.”  
“I’m not, baby. I’ll be moving to Norway.”  
And with that Isak brought their lips together.  
  
He was sure, he’d never get quite used to the feeling of home and safety and freedom, all at the same time, to the faint taste of mint and _Even_ on his tongue.  
When he heard the guys whistling and bawling, the “GET A FUCKING ROOM, BRO!”, he didn’t care. Instead he pulled him closer, the warmth of Even’s skin against his body fulfilling him, like a wave rushing through his limbs all at once. And he smiled, felt the twitch of the corners of Evens lips.  
  
“So… what do you think about dancing with me to celebrate?”  
  
  
  
He was lying in bed, his fingers ghosting over Evens chest, painting circles and patterns into the fabric of the white shirt.  
  
“Do you think it’s a good idea?”, Even asked eventually and Isak let out a little hum.  
“What do you mean?”  
There were seconds of silence, before he said: “Me moving to Oslo.”  
“Why? Don’t you want to?”  
“Of course I want to. There is nothing I’d rather do. Moving here. Getting to study what I love. Being with you”, Even explained, his fingers carefully combing through Isak’s hair, before he continued: “I’m just… I’m not easy. We’ve spent most of the time in our relationship over one thousand kilometres away from each other and… I’m… I guess, I’m worried that you’ll see how I am and get tired of me.”  
He sat up, leaning over his boyfriend and looking at him with an earnest expression.  
“I never said I want easy. Hell, if I wanted easy I would have fallen in love with some girl from my school. But I want you, Even. And I’m aware that it’s not going to be some sort of Disney love story, but let’s be real, Disney love stories can be kind of shit anyway. I mean who marries someone after like… two days?”  
  
He saw him smile in the semi-darkness.  
  
“What I’m saying is… I want you to move to Oslo. Because I think we can make it. And because I still hate skyping.”  
  
A small grin formed on his lips before he kissed him.  
  
“Also kissing is way harder when you’re in Seattle”, Isak continued.  
He smiled when he heard Even let out a small laugh. “Yeah, that’s true. Although I’ll miss seeing you all hot and bothered via skype.”  
“You’d rather see me getting off via skype than doing it yourself?” he asked, cocking his head slightly.  
“I’m just saying you looked really hot like that, babe.”  
He climbed onto his lap, placing his hands beneath the fabric and letting his fingertips rest next to the trail of fine hair leading into Even’s (actually into Isak’s) sweatpants.  
“Yeah?” he simply asked, before Even pulled him down by the hem of his shirt, bringing their lips together.  
“Yeah.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Voilà, that's it. It's officially over now. The story is finished and I sort of feel like a mother waving her children goodbye when they take the bus to school for the very first time. 
> 
> Thank you all for reading. Thank you for sticking with _You say good morning when it's midnight_ until the very end. Thank you for leaving comments. Thank you for the kudos.  
>  The feedback on this work has been amazing and you made me happy so many times with sending me little messages or just showing me that you've liked the story.  
> Thank you, thank you, thank you!
> 
> Another thank you goes to:  
> [vulpecvlae](http://vulpecvlae.tumblr.com/) for beta-reading, dealing with my rambling about the fanfic all the time and helping me with plot-holes and difficulties. The story wouldn't have been the same without you! <3
> 
> and to:  
> [DickAnderton](http://archiveofourown.org/works/search?utf8=%E2%9C%93&work_search%5Bquery%5D=dickanderton) who inspired me in so many ways. Thank you for keeping me motivated with our little writing sessions!
> 
> Another thing, in case any of you are interested in what's going to happen now this story is over:  
> I'm currently working on a new project. The first chapter should be up this week (maybe even tomorrow?).  
> It's about Isak, a dog and misunderstandings.  
> I'll edit this note and link the fanfic as soon as it's uploaded, if you want to read it!!
> 
> Thank you all so very much.  
> I hope you have the loveliest of days.


End file.
